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jonathan86 young johnnyb - still grinning lyrics

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i’m unsigned and unknown
i just stay rhyming freestyling
like i’m on a deadline
and my life hangs in the balance dying
born in new york
but johnny wasn’t raised on long island
i hop, skipped, and split
across the country, bus riding///

poverty line i lived below it
born poor, and my clothes showed it
now that i’m grown
i realized i’m glad that i wasn’t born rich
suffering and grief
must be the recipe for happiness//

my whole life
in addictions grip
and i can’t seem to shake it
i took the pain and misery
lyrically recreated it
all the blood, sweat and tears
over the years i’ve traded in
replaced them with the strength required daily
with my pad and pen

i guess i just felt the need to digress
vocalize every ounce of stress
i feel inside of my chest
told id never amount to sh-t
when i was a little kid
wishing his position was different
and p-ssin in the wind

chorus——————————
i made a promise to myself
early on that i’d never give in
i’ve walked thru h-ll
burning alive, and never stopped grinning
thankful every single day
its always thanksgiving
grateful just to wake up in the morning
still living

moneys not what i’m aiming
to achieve in the music industry
all i need’s serenity
and crowds of people feeling me
soon as i hear the beat
i can start to feel it healing me

verse 2

believe me
every word that i speak is to try and reach
every person in the galaxy
my goal is to teach
heal and give strength to the weak

even if it’s only one fan
i made a difference
in this god forsaken land
i used to pretend
i had a dad and a ton of friends
wasn’t living in a different
apartment every other weekend

living on welfare
in a warzone for a household
at school he was bullied
for being new and wearing old clothes
my early years were darker than an
underground tunnel
getting pummeled
so i acted out was always in trouble

early on i lost my faith in god
debated the odds
but that was lost when i
ate garbage just so i wouldn’t
starve
mom’s couldn’t afford to pay
cold showers and lights off
run-ins with the law
that always
got me locked inside a box

i’ve been blessed with a gift n i refuse to remain silent
potential pouring out my pencil
lead flying like tech nines and
i learned alot lot of lessons
battled depression
and anxiety
but now i’ve been enlightened
my slate wiped clean

i traversed the earth to find purpose
and found what i was searching
for looking right back at me
i know now that it was a worth it
headed for death or prison
so i chose an alternate version
and decided to go on living

the moral of the story is clear
if you let it sink in
when you feel like you can’t see tommorow
like your life has no reason
breath in deep and
use your anguish and rage
as strength instead of a weakness
i truly mean this
i’ve battled demons
as long as i can think back
had bad dreams

but that’s the life of a damaged
awkward kid with bad parents
blatenely apparent to me by the age of three, it was a dead marriage
i’d have to teach myself to read, to feed
basically how to do everything

like a savage
on top of having a habit
i can barely manage
the panic attacks
are starting to have
a drastic affect
on my chest
im starting to crack
feel like im having a heart attack
cardiac arrest
from the stress
and chainsmoking ciggarettes

chorus——————————
i made a promise to myself
early on that i’d never give in
i’ve walked thru h-ll
burning alive, and never stopped grinning
thankful every single day
its always thanksgiving
grateful just to wake up in the morning
still living

- jonathan86 young johnnyb lyrics

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