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jordan jonesy - merry fuckin' christmas, eat my shit! lyrics

[chorus]
merry f-ckin’ christmas
eat my shit!
make sure that you gobble all of it!
the guests are comin’ soon
so it cannot smell this bad
merry f-ckin’ christmas, eat my shit!
eat it, eat it, swallow all of it

[verse 1]
here’s the topic of discussion
it’s that fruitcake gives me the runs
i begin to lose control
and shit seeps right outta my buns
i felt it in there, i knew how mushy brown it’d be
i tried to hurry but the brownness got the best of me
it shot from out me, on the cold floor
muck and muddy like a cold sore
it’s disgusting, i can’t smell this
feels like i could die just like elvis
and what’s worse is, there’s guests comin’
in the meantime, there’s some plumbing
necessary, things’ll get hairy
eat it up, slave, please by wary
you must haul -ss, i know it’s flawless
to all f-ggots, and you’d rather see it sit until it attracts all the maggots
it must be done very quickly
or else my guests might look quite sickly

[chorus]
merry f-ckin’ christmas
eat my shit!
you gotta mouth-mop it up to save my tits!
the guests are comin’ soon
and this pickle is bad
merry godd-mn christmas, eat my shit!
suck it, lick it, swallow all of it

[verse 1]
c’mon slave, hurry, what’s withholding?
are you waiting for its molding?
sick, sick n-gg-, shit couldn’t be bigger
eat it up quick, ‘fore i pull my trigger
mouth to muck, i don’t give a d-mn f-ck
if it’s gross or whatever, meh, suck it up!
once you do, i’ll spray disinfectant
f-g, haul -ss now! things’ll get hectic
if you can’t hurry, oh, goddammit
unless you want me to shit more, clam it
quit your sobbin’, start your gobblin’
hurry up, b-tch, the clock’s tick-tockin’
mmm, is that tasty? eat it hastily
chug it down, pretend it’s not pasty
kinda looks like birdshit, don’t know if you heard shit
but eatin’ fruitcake, it gives me the worst shit
all in your tummy, wasn’t that yummy?
now you’ve got to wipe my b-mmy
there’s no tp, so this may be p.u
but little shitty-tongued n-gg-, my -sshole is countin’ on you
lick it up now, make it sure i’m clean
i could give shits if it’s obscene
there’s a knock at the door, clean me up, wh-r-
okay, is it all good? i’ll pull up my drawers
come out with me, shit-tongued f-ggot
serve my guests as a chair or h-ssock
whether it’s a foot-stool, or eatin’ up slut stool
your -ss disgusts me, you f-ckin’ f-ggot

[chorus #1]

shit, i shat again!

- jordan jonesy lyrics

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