juno songs - the fanged fastener, stapler lyrics
(spoken)
[king olly]
bind them
[stapler]
(barking)
[bowser]
hey! that’s the thing! that’s the thing that turned me into… this!
mario… you gotta win this one!
(sung)
[king olly]
your journey is ending
and your efforts are feeble
you will heel, you will fall
with the rest of your people
gaze into darkness
the fangs of submission
this hubris of paper
leads only to perdition
[bowser]
can it, ya twerp!
unfold me, ya jerk!
even i, a pro villain
wouldn’t do this kind of work!
[king olly]
short+sighted and foolish
but to be expected;
and now, to my pup
your attention be directed
impressive, is it now?
my perfect little pet
a pristine pedigree
the brightest i could get
it can sit, fetch, shake
roll overland other things
but its most important trick’s
to hail the origami king
[bowser]
bah!
that’s your plan?!
to sic your dog on mario?!
he will bounce you, and trounce you
believe me, i know!
[king olly]
you talk far too much
but i’ve already won
with your army in my palm
my conquest is done!
soon, you will join the princess
shaped into a perfect form
soon, all the world will bow
be bound by steel to a new norm
soon, fanged shackles lock
your kingdoms in my folded war
soon, those who dared defile my soul
shall be no more!
(spoken)
[king olly]
patience, my pet. they will join the ranks of the folded soldiers soon enough
[bowser]
hah! as if i’d ever bow to you, ya little runt! if i had my hands right now, i’d strangle you!
[king olly]
bold words, from a glorified name tag. it’s only a matter of time until your resistance is quashed
sic them
(sung)
[king olly]
fall to the chains
in king olly’s name
you will bend all the same
and submit to my reign
the staples will lock you
in forms that i choose
with no princess to lead you
your kingdom will lose
[bowser]
oh, shut your dang pie hole!
you yap on and on
but if i know my nemesis
he’d never be your p+wn!
you cut up my kid!
even i’m not that mean!
but the plumber. will squash you
ya purple drama queen!
i know mario
he’s stubborn as a mule
he’s gonna snap in half
your stupid office tool
for many, many games
i’ve felt the hurt he brings!
so i know he’d never hail
the origami king
[king olly]
you underestimate the power
of my stapler’s binds
you’ll be fastened and chastened
and the world will be mine!
its howls at the moon say
you are out of time
you will not stand in the way
of my vision sublime!
soon, you will join the princess
shaped into a perfect form
soon, all the world will bow
be bound by steel to a new norm
soon, fanged shackles lock
your kingdoms in my folded war
soon, those who dared defile my soul
shall be no more!
[stapler]
(barking)
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