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justina valentine - just lyrics

[chorus]
my tea’s gone cold, i wondering why i got out of bed at all
the morning rain clouds up my window, and i can’t see at all
and even if i could it’d all be grey, but your picture on my wall
it reminds me that it’s not so bad, it’s not so bad

[verse 1]
dear future self, where do i start?
they wouldn’t be so hard on me if they knew my heart
if they knew the trials and tribulations that i was facin’
just to get up on that mic, their dissaprovin’ faces
but truthfully i understand at first glance
i wouldn’t give me a chance either, that’s just human nature
but the hate they spew at me is equal to or greater
that of someone wantin’ me to say “see ya later”
off myself, stop my breathing, words with hateful meanin’
make me drop down to my knees and just pray to jesus
to keep my mind from these dark thoughts that’s creepin’ in
i thought i was strong enough but i’m weakenin’
it’s crazy, this world is really ran by guys
they don’t look for females’ talents, they listen with their eyes
but i gotta keep goin, i know that’s a must
i just hope tomorrow’s better, it’s ya girl, just

[verse 2]
dear future self, this sh-t is gettin’ harder
i’m not gettin’ the credit i deserve, i should be farther
and everyone’s so scared to take a leap of faith
even though they know i’m great
i’m surrounded by spineless and mindless fakes
they won’t cosign, they’re waitin’ for someone else
i’m drownin’, i’m barely alive, waitin’ for someone to help
they goin’ in on me online, why do i f-ckin rhyme?
b-tch, you f-ckin white, go k!ll yourself tonight
plus you’re ugly, you got no -ss, your looks are trash
i wouldn’t f-ck you with his d-ck wrapped in a garbage bag
girls are even worse
a p-ssy’s a gift and a curse
god forbid a b-tch praisin’ another b-tch
we don’t even know our own worth
i feel a number on my days, the end is on it’s way
i walk around in a haze, depression ain’t no phase
my breath is gettin’ short, my spirit gettin’ heavy
i feel the weight of the words, i think i must be ready
my brain is consumed with the deepest, darkest evil thoughts
i try to shake it out my head, my better judgement lost
and all along, i put my all into every song
i don’t get how doin somethin you love could ever be so wrong
i guess i’ll sleep on it, i’m tired
i don’t remember what i took, but i’m higher
my diary the only one i trust
i hope tomorrow’s better, your girl, just

[verse 3]
dear future self, i’m a decade deep
i been grindin’ 10 years and they still don’t mention me?
what are they stupid? do they not hear me on these tracks?
i knew i should of let what’s his name put it in my -ss
they went and got ke$ha, nicki, and iggy
i know it’s not a lot of girls, but why didn’t they pick me?
i mean it’s clear, no one does what i do
i sing, i rap, and i write my own sh-t too
i don’t give a f-ck, f-ck the whole industry
f-ck every label head, i hope they all die f-ckin miserably
i hope your kids never ever meet their dreams
i hope your plane crashes, you and your whole team
ain’t that funny? look what you fools do to me
i hope they get that sh-t right at your and my eulogy
i hope we both rot in h-ll together, we deserve it
me for wishin’ this wicked and you for destroyin’ my purpose
and for every lonely troll online
i hope you develop the most aggressive form of cancer of the spine
decay your body, while your mind is still intact
and i’ma send a postcard that reads “i got your back”
but you won this time, every dog has it’s day
’cause now i’m standin on a chair and i’m just one push away
from finally bein’ at peace, blockin’ my sorrow
and now i don’t have to worry about a better tomorrow

[verse 4]
dear justina, i know you’re fightin demons
but nothing in this world that’s worth it, ever comes too easy
the human mind can play tricks, it gets dark and gory
it takes 10 years for an overnight success story
just keep going, the journey’s never perfect
i know the way they’re treatin’ you is crazy
but i promise it’s worth it
you’re gonna fall a few more times, don’t mind the stumble
take my word, there’s a light here that ends the tunnel
it’s more to it than the eye could ever see
you know that show with nick cannon
yeah, the one that’s on mtv?
well that’s right, wild ‘n out, they about to hit you
you about to join on for season 8, now that’s official
things are lookin up, people recognize your flow
you about to see, the world is gonna know you’re cold
and everything’s about to blow up from there
you’re a household name, people they stop and they stare
and years later, look, you chillin’, got a family
at the crib, 3 oscars and 5 grammies
it’s crazy, i mean life is but a dream
all of this is an outcome you could have never seen
wait, hold up, everything’s turnin’ to grey
the babies, the grammies, everything’s slippin’ away
f-ck, forget what i said
this is what could have been, you’re dead

- justina valentine lyrics

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