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kadin lightel - soliloquies lyrics

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stuck in my head lounge music in the background
i look around at all the people i have let down
so many faces in the pages of my storybook
half of them still have faith in me
the other half has given up
and why wouldn’t they
i am a letdown people who love me
slowly watch me try to find a noun
instead of find a job or
enough credits to graduate
i can barely finish what is on my
f-cking dinner plate
i sit in my dirty room writing soliloquies
about the breeze to a warm autumn tune
try to forget all the problems i’ve caused
if i think about them too much i feel so lost
and why is life so anethetical
my depression and anxiety they make me skeptical
how can anyone be content with the thought of wishing
if i can’t make myself happy,then what’s the point of living
i just want to be the person they say i can be
but the longer i look in the mirror
the more tears run down my cheeks
so i’ll continue to write in this notebook that i keep
but i know down deep inside my sadness plays on repeat



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