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kai andrew$ - jade lyrics

[verse 1]
i been…having conversations with myself i feel anxious
tryna figure out what i embody, i been patient
just like corpse in morgue, how adjacent
those lines were to the state i am laid in
i feel dead inside, not caged in
homie, there’s a difference, lemme explain it
tried to go outside but esteem’s with my hatred
i have so much to say but can’t say it
unless it’s in a song or the alcohol
cuz those times i feel so alive
it’s those times i don’t feel like curving up a lie
i’m numb these days when i’m sober, i’ve tried
need a song and the alcohol, i might die
it’s where i speak truth
i speak true things through that 43 proof
and speak true things through the chords and the loops

[chorus]
how parallel, in unison like a carousel
sitting in my home, it’s feeling like jail
tried to free my mind, but to no avail
when i be hurt, ain’t n0body there
cuz it’s 3 am, and i’m h+lla scared
haven’t been the same, cuz you ain’t here
i’ll never be the same, cuz you not here
[verse 2]
pour up for the blood and the sweat and the tears
my heart’s hurt so my liver’s gotta compromise
i revamp a lot of memories that’s in mind
like a bat, for the dark times
i been grieving a lot, and matter of fact
it was for the memories that died on wax
that’s why i get drunk and then try to rehash
if i sent a text that i shouldn’t, i’m sorry
i’m just…tryna converse with some of y’all and i’m anxious
you can see the pain in my eyes, lemme say this
wrote me three songs about a girl i can’t save
a lotta my friends would refer her to a hoe
but i just see a jade that’s just struggling to grow
wait for the rain, you’ll remember your roots
that’s how the words go
and don’t forget to hug your fam when you get home
the world is f+cked up, and we’re the s+x slaves
and some diamonds in the rough
trust me, i know, i ran outta luck
and when i overthink, it’s f+ck a shot glass
put a 4, no dash
i drink the same color as my skin, how symbolic
i feel like me and brandy have a lot in common
we’re both brown and we take notes with the tonics
wouldn’t do it cuz my dad’s not an alcoholic
well, i am not my dad
when i was down bad i had two things
crying over lost ones, sitting on my mood swings
all alone, relying on my wits that were sinking
feeling like a jade at a point where it’s wilting
back to the point, i tried to say i had two things
i had my raps with an opportune cost
and i had shots that i took in the bars
[pre+chorus]
how parallel, never relapsed
cuz i’ve just started, and i’ll never quit
i am that sick, with the good and the bad and the departed
know i’m counted out, my tears dry now
thank you miss winehouse
i know they’ll come again but they will not stay
you were a jade like her everyday, like her name

[chorus]
how parallel, in unison like a carousel
sitting in my home, it’s feeling like jail
tried to free my mind but to no avail
but when i was hurt, you were right there
it was 3 am, i was not scared
i just felt safe, cuz you were right here
nothing was the same, cuz you were right here

- kai andrew lyrics

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