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kathy & stella solve a murder - kathy and stella's murder podcast lyrics

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h+llo people
all you lovely listeners
thanks for joining us again
welcome back

if you’re new here
you’ve stumbled on our podcast
or it’s been recommended by a friend

just sit back and relax
we’re coming to you from my mum’s garage
with crackers and cheese, and a bottle of pinot on the side
our show has been described as the perfect marriage of boozy jokes, cheeky banter and in+depth chat about homicide

that’s right we’re gonna be telling you all about our favourite murdеrs
only not using that phrase
oh yep sorry, that’s already a thing

thе show’s about true crime. we’re obsessed with murder
if it’s sick, perverse or twisted you know we just can’t resist it
we’ve done the reading. all the facts and figures
we plumbed the depths of wikipedia to research every vile misdeed for you

decapitation and s+x cult mass suicide
stabbing, shooting, hanging, drowning, poisoning with cyanide
strangulation then gouging out the eyes
psycho rapist cannibals who burn their victims alive
and yes, if you’re suffering with trauma these tales may cause distress
turn off it’s not for you, but still nevertheless
consider this your trigger warning
from this point there’s no turning back, no deviations we’re staying on track

the show that you’re listening to is
kathy and stella’s murder podcast we’ve got crimes for you
kathy and stella’s murder podcast, every single one is true
the murder podcast with kathy and stella, don’t turn off we’ve got lots to tell you
join us now cos we’re having a blast on kathy and stella’s murder podcast

but in case you haven’t heard us before
my name’s kathy
and i’m stella
i work in a library
i’m between jobs

we’re from beverley, near hull
you won’t have heard of it
she’s my best friend
she’s mine
we went to school together
since year five
she’s the person that i call when things turn to sh+t

we’ve always been a little bit obsessed with murder
not just the famous ones that everybody’s heard of
and though it’s true our audience is small (so far)
one day we’ll show the world the best true crime podcast of them all is
kathy and stella’s murder podcast but hey by now you’ve probably got that
so let’s read out some listener emails, listener emails
give us your feedback, we love to receive mail

first up, ruthless92 says “omg i love you, you are everything”
ah right back at you mate

forensic steve says “actually i think you’ll find…”
yeah blah blah blah, we made a mistake

disrespectra says “you should be ashamed using people’s pain for your entertainment”
yeah we know

and doomscroller sent us seven dms saying “eat c+ck and die you f+cking lesbians”
oh that’s nice

kathy and stella’s murder podcast, accept no substitute
kathy and stella’s murder podcast the perfect length for your commute
your a to z with kathy and stella, documenting every serial k!ller
tales to shock and flabbergast
well researched and unbiased
hit subscribe and do it fast to
kathy and stella’s murder podcast
podcast
podcast
kathy and stella’s murder podcast



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