kelly abe - to fuck a life lyrics
when you f-ck to forget and you drink to remember;
when the day’s an inferno and night’s are december;
when you’re dreaming eternal, but living dismembered;
these are the signs of a carnal surrender.
when the minutes are needles slammed into your neck;
and there’s nothing to die for or live to protect;
when your heartbeat’s a ring tone and love becomes stress;
these are the signs of a heart attack chest.
when your losing religion and praying to god;
ignoring decision and stumbling on
a place in your mind recognized as fascade;
these are the signs that your senses are gone.
when your bloodstream is violent, and air becomes ill;
when w a t c h i n g blood spill’s a phenomenol thrill;
and your dying to injur and living to kill;
these are the signs that your losing your will.
when sleeping’s proactive and waking’s retractive;
and taking a beating’s becoming attractive;
when going to work means becoming a captive;
these are the signs you’re no longer reactive.
i’m losing my f-cking mind doing this sh-t
the old tender touch is a f-cking vice grip
the love and the l-st are just fountains of hatred
and i frown on the norm but i’m doing the same sh-t
i hate myself worse than i hate why i hate myself
make myself worse then i shake and i face myself
make myself thirst then i wait and i race myself
wake myself first then i pace and remake myself
shame my self worth when i take and erase myself
sleep and i wake just to fake f-cking chase myself
it’s f-cked up how i never thought about suicide
till i thought about how i never thought about suicide
you and i knew that it’s the pain that makes the truest eye.
talking to myself is the remaining hope to blue my sky.
god, if your there, i need answers to prayers, cause right now insanity looks like a f-cking vacation
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