kilpréz - a drowning smile lyrics
how long
has it been this way?
i can no longer tell
if it’s been ages or days
colours start to blend
as every day feels exactly the same
slowly sucked into
a black hole
terrified
yet apathetic all at once
all the time in the world and time stands still
with an ever growing void to fill
can’t wait to be free
all the time in the world and time stands still
with an ever growing void to fill
crippling fear of the aftermath
no pressure
yet crushed by the lack of it
a deep sea creature
afraid of the dark
all the time in the world and time stands still
with an ever growing void to fill
can’t wait to be free
all the time in the world and time stands still
with an ever growing void to fill
crippling fear of the aftermath
confined within the four walls of home
no one to be, nowhere to go
every day amounts to
talkin’ bout nothing, to no one
when does home stop being home
becomes a prison
where no one stops you from leaving
yet you don’t go out
for nothing, or no one
rinse and repeat
nauseating
solitary relief
a drowning smile
takes shape underneath
stuck somewhere between nothing and no one
oblivious or just destined to fail
agora+ and claustrophobic
all at once
can’t stand the safety
of this crumbling kingdom
hyperfocus kicking in
perhaps it’s not bad that i’ve got time
to think for the first time in years
a chance to introspect, assess and
reach a conclusion that maybe a
new normal is what we need
i’ve never felt so
unsure about anything
my hopes and fears
drawn and quartered
at least uncertainty
means nothing’s been decided
endless possibilities
i’m in control
my kingdom
goes from wall to wall
within it i can do
anything at all
not imprisoned
no shackles, no fear
without expectations
no pressure, no peers
freedom in limitation
i’ll never go back
to the way
it was
rinse and repeat
self+fulfilling
solitary relief
a drowning smile
takes shape underneath
stuck somewhere between nothing and no one
oblivious or just destined to fail
agora+ and claustrophobic
all at once
can’t stand the safety
of this crumbling kingdom
just because you’re alone
locked inside a prison of your own mind
your own home
doesn’t mean you can’t have a little fun, right?
i beg
for a new paradigm
not asking for paradise
just something that’s
not quite so
unrelenting
never ending
overwhelming
catatonic
constantly in motion
haven’t moved an inch in months
hyperactive and docile
pulling myself up
would require anti+gravity
someone take me away from this place
so long, stuck in this
comfort zone of misery
can’t help but feel
this is exactly where i belong
left behind
lay awake
thinking back to a life with dreams
stay awake
at least the living nightmare’s real
lay awake
sleep has nothing to offer but another day
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