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king bob - midas lyrics

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[verse 1]
roll out of bed at 7, i got work but i forgot
show up, spill coffee everywhere, and cut the tip of my finger off
i’ve got the opposite of the midas touch
everything i lay my hands on gets f+cked up

anxiety swells when someone asks me, “what is it you do?”
accepting judgment for the vocation i’m forced to pursue
guess i’ll stay here and just keep getting old
everything i touch is someone else’s gold

[chorus]
all i ever do is dishes
discarded food is all i see
then i come home and do more dishеs
won’t someone pleasе, please, do these dishes for me?

[verse 2]
patience is a virtue unless you’re the clientele
maybe the plebs will pick it up if you decide to yell
i’m tired man, i’m too old for this sh+t
and i’d leave if i could afford to take the hit

but if you want food that’s fresh and hot, you’ll have to wait a tic
did you come here to eat a quinoa salad or to be a f+cking d+ck?
it’s time to cut my hair and get a real job
’cause i am not king midas, i’m king bob
[chorus]
all i ever do is dishes
discarded food is all i see
then i come home and do more dishes
won’t someone please, please, do these dishes for me?

all i ever eat is takeout
that someone else decided not to eat
then i go home and order takeout
won’t someone please, please, just make dinner for me?

- king bob lyrics

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