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kingston xv - mental chains lyrics

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[verse 1]
warfare, locked up inside
imprisoned my mind been a while now
befriending these vices, playin’ with fire
was a one way road bound to go down
should’ve known better but it’s too late to change it
bad habits takeover when i feel anxious
something’s wrong with me i know without a doubt
let’s step in my head and take a look around
sparks are flying, it’s a ruin everywhere
shouting out, there’s nothing but dust
lying around my serotonin corpses
couldn’t escape must have ran outta options
yeah, all hope is lost
dark as a night of a winter spell
will i find the right answer to my thoughts
my life isn’t normal that’s all i can tell
friends or family come and go to me i’m sorry
it’s a bad habit thinking i’m fine by myself
when i am lonely i wanna be with others
but when i’m with others i wanna be alone
habitual distancing, anxiety creepin’ in
feelin’ discomfort ’round those that i love
i don’t go around burning bridges not at all
but when the time comes i’m indifferent, let ’em fall like
[chorus]
mental chains, can’t breakaway
so much pain runnin’ through my veins
see a ray of hope and change
watch it all burnin’ up in flames
mental chains, i can’t explain
tried to change a thousand ways
lookin’ back to the better days
hopin’ this is just a phase that one day will fade

[verse 2]
fade, fade, please fade away
these mental chains got a hold me
ran away just to fall back the same
i guess there’ll never be a better me
but i’ll never settle down till i understand
why’s everything good of mine built up on sand
crashing down, outlines of white chalk
while my flaws are as solid as rock
discomfort, preventing my smiles
deep down, i wanna reach out
self+defence mechanisms
keeping my distance not showing emotion
nothing left for you, they’ve taken all of me
can’t show my love or look in your eyes
connecting brings out my habits of closing in
the world feels so cold when i can’t live happily
therapist told me to look inside
seek for a light i can stand by
got nothing, just dirt on my hands
narrowly functional hangin’ by a thread
looking back on the photos
i see a younger me
not over thinking, happy and free
but he’s gone now, r. i. p
[chorus]
mental chains, can’t breakaway
so much pain runnin’ through my veins
see a ray of hope and change
watch it all burnin’ up in flames
mental chains, i can’t explain
tried to change a thousand ways
lookin’ back to the better days
hopin’ this is just a phase that one day will fade

[outro]
(you have one new message)
(you can run but you cannot hide
we’ll stay with you till the day you die)
voice mail
sent from the darkest depths of my mind
i’ve failed
goodbye



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