kitty carnage - the ballad lyrics
[intro]
well, there once was an assh0l+ named ritter
who f+cked b+tches and drank whiskey bitter
he k!lled folks for cash and made them scream and slash
till they lay dead, no longer a litter
but then he met keith, the catboy so fine
with his cute little ears and his furry behind
[chorus]
ritter fell hard, lost his d+mn mind
f+ck me, keith! + he’d cry
oh so blind
i’ll stalk you forever, till the day i die
my obsession with you will never subsidе!
[verse 1]
keith was a d+ck, cold and aloof
kept ritter at bay likе a b+tch in a huff
but ritter persisted, a stalker so true
creeping on keith like a perv in a stew
[chorus]
ritter fell hard, lost his d+mn mind
f+ck me, keith! + he’d cry
oh, so blind
i’ll stalk you forever, till the day i die
my obsession with you will never subside!
[verse 2]
oh, keith, my sweet nerdy boy
your indifference drives me wild, oh joy
i’ll stalk you forever till the day i die
my obsession with you will never subside
so here’s to ritter, the crazy+ass dude
whose love for keith knows no bounds, no attitude
may his stalking continue, night after night
’till keith surrenders and f+cks him real tight!
[chorus]
ritter fell hard, lost his d+mn mind
f+ck me, keith! + he’d cry
oh, so blind
i’ll stalk you forever, till the day i die
my obsession with you will never subside!
[chorus]
ritter fell hard, lost his d+mn mind
f+ck me, keith! + he’d cry
oh, so blind
i’ll stalk you forever, till the day i die
my obsession with you will never subside!
ritter fell hard, lost his d+mn mind
f+ck me!
[bridge]
in the end, did ritter win his heart?
did they live happily ever after
like a fairy tale start?
nope! f+ck that noise!
keith still hates his guts!
but ritter don’t give a f+ck, he’s still got his nuts!
[verse 3]
so raise your glass high and give a cheer
for the ballad of the assh0l+ and the catboy dear
it’s a tale as old as time itself
of obsession, murder, and loves cruel knell!
but ritter don’t give a f+ck!
[chorus]
ritter fell hard, lost his d+mn mind
f+ck me, keith! + he’d cry
oh, so blind
i’ll stalk you forever, till the day i die
my obsession with you will never subside!
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