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kleenex girl wonder - the best shape of my life lyrics

i put a picture of my d+ck on facebook
and then i slipped into a hole when they took
my profile down
even though everybody knows by now:
i’m just a shallow narcissist and i don’t close my mouth
when i breathe
that’s why they unfriend me
that’s why i lay upon my bathroom floor for more than ten weeks
self+medicating with menthol cigarettes and hennessey
i swear these 50 fexofenadine will be the death of me!
but it’s true:
it’s not fair
it’s not cool
it’s not right
you’re listening to belle and sebastian in the middle of the night!
meanwhile, i’m in the best shape of my life

so do you like me now?
going hard in the paint
to retrieve a rebound
when it started to rain
the mascara streamed down my face
now it’s only a clown
that’s leaving, someday
for some reason, somehow…

i put my music gear into self+storage
and got a separate one to sleep in in norridge
i figured it out:
i’ll build a time machine like primer
then go turn it around
my future couldn’t get much dimmer
but my past is like a cloud
of radium, the size of a stadium
who’s got time for brandywine and laudanum and ladyfriends?
n0body, as it turns out, but still the déclasseé pretend
that they are way more h0m+ sapiens than h0m+ sapiens
and it’s cool
it’s fine
it’s house rules
it’s alright
i’m missing out on so much action;
this play within a play is just a lie about a lie
it’s kinda like when
i say i’m in the best shape of my life

in people magazine
it doesn’t work as a yardstick ‘cause people haven’t seen
the shape i was at birth, and all the ones that came between
the ones i love and me
now it seems
i am strongest when
invisible to everybody

but see, i’m in the best shape of my life

- kleenex girl wonder lyrics

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