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kole xidas - burnt out match against the unlit incense lyrics

burnt out match against the unlit incense lyrics
i burnt out already, nothing but a weak match
glitch in the matrix, hoping i can be patched
got no structure, i pretend that i function
people pleaser, pray for my own destruction

i ain’t worth an abduction, my life ain’t worth sh+t to you
i’m attacked by our enemy and the next day you’re cool
all betrayals forgiven, left me in the dust
and i’m the bad guy for bringing this sh+t up (f+ck)
broken loop ain’t broken, it’s only gotten stronger
she’s right here and holding me down under the water
i ain’t fighting back, i’m breathing in the liquid
i hate that i let this happen, but to thе pain i’m addicted
it’s just as i predicted, еmotionally stunted
no trauma at a young age but my growth was interrupted
insult to the creator’s gift, throw my ass right off a cliff
let my body drift in the waves, but first finish this shift
i still got a job to do after all
even though you won’t notice i’m there, i’m just an afterthought
my guts are spilling out onto my lap as i hold your wound
scr+pped notes already written, but i still know that i’m doomed
still falling into decay, but i won’t get that far
by the time it comes around, i’ll be nothing but a scar
in the earth, in an unmarked grave
even in death, i won’t get the validation my heart craves
i burnt out already, nothing but a weak match
glitch in the matrix, hoping i can be patched
got no structure, i pretend that i function
people pleaser, pray for my own destruction

don’t deserve resin, don’t deserve to be forgiven
i’m the creepy weird guy who will only watch and listen
never take initiative, i ain’t got no drive
i ain’t nish+th, always out on my own, completely deprived
barely surviving, not sure who’s heartbeat i feel
honestly, ever since we met, i ain’t sure of what is real
and what’s the fantasy i conjure up to cope
i hate your grip on my throat but won’t ask you to let go
i enjoy having the life choked out of me slowly
sometimes i wonder if i want to be lonely
but for real, not some joke sh+t, i don’t ever go outside
i say that i want to live, but deep down i think i’d rather die

trudging through the sludge for almost a year
it’s been a year and some change since i last felt you near
still remember our last kiss, it was quick and unbothered
the last time i saw you, and i ain’t ever recovered
i wonder if you suffered like you always said you did
or if it was all an act to get me to forgive
your slow degradation of my soul
not sure if you were ill too or just desperate for control
i’m too much of a coward to ever pull the trigger
but that silver one is shiny, and i’m thirstin’ for some liquor
maybe tonight will be the night that i end it all
maybe tonight i will face the impending fall
maybe tonight i’ll send this project to my friends online
and they’ll all squirm about, every time that i’m offline
the question in the back of their heads: did he do it?
ain’t in the back of mine, though, cause’ i already blew it
wouldn’t dare to be this explicit 2 years ago
peaked in high school, it turns out that my fears arose
taste of indigo, didn’t realize ‘til recently
don’t tell anyone, if you hear this, you’re sworn to secrecy
i burnt out already, nothing but a weak match
glitch in the matrix, hoping i can be patched
got no structure, i pretend that i function
people pleaser, pray for my own destruction

i burnt out already, nothing but a weak match
glitch in the matrix, hoping i can be patched
got no structure, i pretend that i function
people pleaser, pray for my own destruction

i burnt out already…

- kole xidas lyrics

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