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koly kolgate - my life lyrics

born june 14th, in the year of 87
i never ever thought i’d make it past the age 11
when i was only 7 my daddy went up to heaven
and left me all alone in the gutter just chashin cheddar
my momma she got cancer, but slowly she got better
the virus it left her body, but pain remains forever
at least that’s what she’d always say, everyday, and all d+mn
day, lift that bottle to her face, drink the pain in her life away
a great example to display, kids dont know the right way
kids dont know the wrong way, i had to find my own way, it seems i
took the long way, definitly the wrong way, hit that bong all day
mixed in x and foul play, built the man you see today, lost in life
in disarray, life for me ain’t been the same, ain’t no jokes or fun
and games, prolly go down amidst the flames, ashamed and proud
of my last name, no pointing fingers here, i’m the only one i got to blame
im sorry
thats all that i could ever say, prolly all i’ll ever say
like the blood that in my veins, when cut apart, i bleed permanent
stains, marks and scars build the soul and depth of my brain. forever
fall like the rain from the sky, kept myself up in bed every night askin
‘oh god why?’ no answer, no remorse, no regrets, a picture ain’t no memory
cause eventually, we all start to forget, it fades away, and abrubtly we all
start to see, the effects of the trail or path we’re following, it’s not the life
that you lead, or the road that you take, it’s the solution to our problems
that all of us make. and we can stop and take a breather, a pause or a break
but the world keeps spinning, it ain’t designed to wait. don’t hate, dont waste
time of the day, get up get out, and get ya ass paid, songs played,life made
music is force, hour after hour life’s a verse, a bridge and a chorus
a hook, i’m hooked, it’s the road i done took, and im’a keep on steppin
and back i ain’t gonna look. too much pain too much drama too much hurt
for my momma, not enough for my daddy, i can’t believe he just left me
but it must of been tough, not seein his son’s, having himself an addiction
and a lack of the funds. it’s ashame cause he could’ve been something
but un+married i was born so his job be came struggling, barely made it
and i hate it cause i swear the man was a saint, life just caught him by the nose
and it made him insane. i just wish that he were smarter and ain’t take
that route, life would of been much different, man there ain’t no doubt
i can’t yell at the dead so to this beat im’a shout..

why me???
i need to get out..

my life, all the pain and the stife
it’s getttin a whole lot darker
i need the light
to catch me as i fall
wish i wasn’t there but i lived it
i witnessed it all
the sh+t i saw, no one should ever have to see
the rise and fall, of my entire family
it’s like someone shook the tree
and our branch fell off
when i started to stray
is when all hope was lost…

life goes on though, that’s all i can say, people are born and people live
and people pass away, the in+between time, that’s for your own well being
in a hundred years from now you life will hold no meaning
unless you step up now, and make your mark, this is my attempt
it’s just a shot in the dark. keep trying, dont stop, it ain’t so bad, take what you got
and think about what you could of had, cause with the good there is bad
and with the bad there is good, it’s up to you to decide whih one you should
settle for, take in, live with, obey, it’s up to you and you alone, you’ll find the way
i did, i promise

- koly kolgate lyrics

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