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kranck - an open memo to denis "bike lane" randolph lyrics

this is my latest memo to the kalamazoo city commission regarding the shameless waste of our tax dollars by our traffic engineer, denis “bike lane” randolph. if you agree with me i encourage you to email the city commission at 311@kalamazoocity.org. i see that our esteemed traffic engineer denis “bike lane” randolph is at it again. this time he is spending no doubt thousands of our taxpayer dollars on michigan avenue. he has bottlenecked traffic so that he can create not one, but two bicycle lanes, so that now we have two bike lanes next to the curb, a parking lane out beyond that, and it looks like we are down to just two traffic lanes. this is insanity. traffic is now bottlenecked to create these bicycle lanes that seem to never be used. as i stated previously, mr. randolph is no doubt a fanatical bicyclist himself. he seems to care more about the rights of bicyclists than motorists, and he is spending thousands of our taxpayer dollars on his personal crusade. it is time to terminate the services of denis “bike lane” randolph. it is also time to undo everything he has done. thank you for your attention to this matter. mike miller

- kranck lyrics

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