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kunt and the gang - for a million pounds lyrics

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[k – kunt
lk – little kunt]

k: would you buy shares in northern rock?
lk: no i wouldn’t, definitely not
would you kiss verne troyer on his midget’s c-ck?
k: no i wouldn’t, definitely not
would you call the krays a pair of c-nts?
lk: no i wouldn’t, definitely not
would you suck the goodness out a tramp’s y-fronts?
k: no i wouldn’t, definitely not

lk: but what if i came up to you and offered you a millions pounds to do
something you wouldn’t usually do?
k: what, like tread barefoot in dog’s poo?
lk: yeah, i suppose

k: alright i would, i f-cking would
if you gave me a million pounds
i’d go on my knees and eat c-ck cheese
if you gave me a million pounds
because i’d have a million pounds

k: could you listen to westlife for more than an hour?
lk: yes i could, for a million pounds
would you let pat wicks give you a golden shower?
k: yes i would, for a million pounds
would you fill your pants up with broken gl-ss?
lk: yes i would, for a million pounds
would you suck a fart out of john prescott’s -rs-?
k: yes i would, for a million pounds

k: i’d cut my c-ck off with a rusty saw
lk: have a pool party with barrymore
k: eat raw offal from beadle’s claw
lk: do anne widdecombe bareback and not withdraw

k: for a million smackers i’d slice off my knackers
and sew em back on the other way round
lk: he wouldn’t care if he was sp-nking out backwards
cos he’d have a million pounds
k: yes i’d have a million pounds

k: would you drink a gl-ss of freddie mercury’s jizz?
lk: yes i would, for a million pounds
would you show ainsley with your finger where his walnut is?
k: yes i would, for a million pounds
would you eat a little pebble of human sh-t?
lk: yes i would, for a million pounds
would you kiss a bag lady on the cl-t?
k: yes i would, for a million pounds

lk: i’d cover up for gary glitter
k: eat a whole tray of cat litter
lk: poke some barbed wire up my sh-tter
k: trust jimmy saville as me babysitter

k: i would, i f-cking would
if you gave me a million pounds
harold shipman can have my nan
if he gave me a million pounds
because i’d have a million pounds

lk: i’d wed vanessa feltz and have her as my spouse
k: i’d let my kids sleepover at michael jackson’s house
lk: i’d sh-t up in the air, like a j-panese lady
k: i’d take an unprotected bumming off of paul o’grady

lk: i’d drink a gl-ss of period and smell shane mcgowan’s breath
k: i’d leggit into an old people’s home dressed up as death
lk: i’d spend a day picking bits out of jo brand’s tw-t
k: i’d be a sp-nk bucket hostage round boy george’s flat

lk: i’d shoot barack obama, share a flat with jeffrey dahmer
k: i’d sh-g shannon matthew’s mum in her gob then up the bum
lk: i’d change my name to fred west and start a club up for incest
k: i’d l!ck around the holes of camilla parker-bowles

k: i would, i f-cking would, if you gave me a million pounds
cos i’d have a million pounds
yes, i’d have a million pounds

- kunt and the gang lyrics

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