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la dispute – rhodonite and grief lyrics

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lifetimes live to die
for a moment in the turnaround
i was waiting in the car in drive
watched you hurry on across the parking lot
image of your life in your mind fades
and i could see an anxious strength in you
brave the borne pain
leaning by front door on your cell phone
summer at the convalescent home

“k!ll me by surprise,”
you said, “i don’t want to stay alive
to watch the words go first like hers”
lifetimes live to die
lifetimes live to die

in the winter on the porch
in the window of the door
i watch in the kitchen with your notebook open
frozen in the cold when i come back with wine
at the end of every long night
take a moment you need to just breathe
whole days in treatment plants
aphasic patients, apraxia of speech
weeks and months go by like this
we function on routines
we sleep, we eat, we read
we eat, we drink, we sleep
we keep her picture on the fridge
i keep a rabbit toy for kids
you give me strength to fix myself
i gave you tokens, toys, and gifts to help you grieve

you said, “k!ll me by surprise,” again
“i don’t want to stay alive
to watch the words go first like hers”

winter, we huddled in anger
spring, sadness sinking in
summer, accept all departures
then autumn, start again

winter, we huddled in anger
spring, sadness sinking in
summer, accept all departures
then autumn, start again

i drove around for hours
for which to help you heal
memories we parted once the seasons of our grief

rhodonite for stress relief
promethazine for sleep
a rabbit toy for children
my deep condolences

rhodonite for stress
promethazine for sleep
a rabbit toy for kids
my deep condolences

lifetimes live to die



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