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lice - voyeur picture salesman lyrics

i’m a window cleaner by trade, i take photos of unsuspecting ladies. take-i-ladies-of-photos-unsuspecting: voyeur picture salesman. in this age of immediate access to all things p-rnographic, you’d never believe what folks pay me for an envelope full of these: polaroids of women, most of them not even undressed. i started selling them to friends, now it’s grown into something of a business

(customers:) ‘i’m sick of having naked girls thrown in my face by magazines.’

it was all going swell, sold in the pubs and at work as well; then a customer returns with an envelope i’d sold him the day before, saying some were of his wife, complaining ‘what if someone else saw these?’. i said ‘i think you’re missing the point, sir’, but the fellow won’t listen to me. he claims his brother’s a policeman and threatens to have me arrested if i don’t collect all the photos i sold to people. so i refund everyone, collect all the photos and burn them, and it all went back to how it was, then i hear another window cleaner’s selling them… a fellow takes pride in his work, and doesn’t take kindly to thankless mimicry. i track down the impersonator, and shake the base of his ladder

and now it’s all going swell, sell in the pubs and at work as well, and if that fellow returns… i’ll cross that bridge eventuall-y. i’m a window cleaner by trade, i take photos of unsuspecting ladies. take-i-ladies-of-photos-unsuspecting: voyeur picture salesman

- lice lyrics

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