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lildrakex - mask song lyrics

let me tell y’all a story that reflects back on 2020 about a friend of a friend… you know what? let’s just say a friend. stop convicting people guilty by association, plus you got to become a lawyer before you can judge. anyways, in an attempt to offend, he wanted me to tell his story in first person

it was early 2022, in a restaurant in north cali, where everyone inside was screened for a triple vaccine. after kindly requesting a physical menu due to my ptsd, i excused myself from my very cool upcoming rapper friend to take a leak, although apparently, this city still had a mask policy when you’re not at your seat pretending to sip a drink

“excuse me sir, where’s your toilet?”
“you need to put on a mask”
“sorry, i need to put what in your ass? i can’t hear you behind that mask and plexiglass”
he took off his mask and said
“i said, you need to put on a mask”
“oh, i have a medical condition, where’s your restroom?”
“it’s to the left of that marquee, you’ll need this key”

he hands me a key attached to a large wooden spoon that i’m sure is covered with poo and pee, just like the toilet seat, although i’m less concerned with organic waste particles lingering on my ass, since alas, i can’t eat my own ass, then i am with sitting on toxic bleach that they were supposed to be using to clean. was the prop 82 warning for nothing? i’m glad cancer wasn’t on the menu today

the washroom was out of soap and paper towel, only having one of those hand dryers you put your hand in between that sprays warm live pathogens onto your skin, but luckily i didn’t touch anything, although my aim was a little off. oh wait, i’ve been gripping this key, i wish i’d known to use my sleeve. i guess my hand will just go insane trying not to pick my nose until i can find some sanitizer or soap

even though i always keep paper towel or a tissue in my pocket, no one’s invented a double+sided version of it yet with a different color or pattern so i know which side has already touched my feces covered fingers! hey bounty or kleenex, there’s my pitch!

however, double+sided tissue, won’t fix the double standard issue of people being allowed to smoke cigarettes and consume carcinogenics yet can’t make their own decision on whether they want to limit their oxygen flow and risk a pimple

now i know some of you are probably saying “get take out if you don’t like the rules”
okay! let’s go through this starbucks drive+thru and order a tea and croissant where the barista now hands me a tablet for a ‘quick question’. i’ll just press my eating finger onto the area with the least amount of your germs, and not even discreetly, i am hoping that the cutie see’s so i have a better opportunity to taste that spit for free

back to the issue at hand, if you’re going to create mandates that control what grown adults put on and in their mouth, either go after the top picks or eat my chopped d+ck, at least it won’t k!ll you

8 out of 10 of the leading causes of death can be contributed to what you put in your body, plus i’m sure accidents can be significantly reduced if the hypocrat aristocrats outright ban alcohol and cars amongst the consumption of certain processed meats, sodas, fast foods, and seed oils or exposure to toxic chemicals like those in some sunscreen. in fact, just outright ban the sun
fun fact #1, australia has the highest cancer rate in the world per capita
fun fact #2, instead of healthy eating and staying fit, the citizens of the covid era did the exact opposite

as soon as the airplane mask policy was struck down, 99% of you went freeballing on those seedy seats. did covid suddenly go away or were you sheep just doing what they say?

this is for the modern day heroes that had no ears, the single musketeer, those that didn’t want to live those years in fear, those who stood up for unjust laws by walking around with an unlit cigarette or lollipop dangling from their mouth

+coughing
hey, i’m back, that was an interesting story my friend told yah? what a bologna head, right? or should i say left. remember not to shoot the messenger, i swear i already survived 2 of them

uh, that was supposed to fit into the song by the way at the end but obviously i have no idea what i’m doing

- lildrakex lyrics

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