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little black book the musical - pandering lyrics

[heidi]
well, the brand new head at the lapd
walked in to roll call thumbing the times
said

[sheriff/girl 3]:
“first order of business is this heidi wh0re
just under noses, in front of our faces
pimpin her girls out
committing her crimes”
[heidi]
dispatched some hack named sammy lee
to a party at the rangoon racket club
dressed him up nice, from the hair to the shoes
clearly knowing no call girl crawls up on a schlub

[three girls]
well, he spots the poor chick who in time will be sorry
as he circles the club in a rented ferrari
they start chatting at the bar
about his business and his car
after a drink, he sets the bait

[sammy]
men need release, you’re aware, babe
and i won’t deny i’m a man
and profits increase, you’re aware babe
when you please the business partners from j+pan
how bout i book a suite at sunset tower
how bout you pencil in about an hour
how bout tomorrow night
how bout you bring two friends?

[girl 2]
alright!
[heidi]
he’s on the prowl for

[all]
pandering, pandering, pandering
pandering, pandering, pandering

[three girls]
well the girls went to meet that sammy lee

[heidi]
and two j+panese cops who were thrilled to be there

[three girls]
we knocked on the door
of the penthouse apartment
they greeted us warmly
and pulled up a chair

[girl 1]
the men laid down 5 grand in cash

[girl 3]
and they said they’d love a little show

[girls]
we start strippin down
as we put on some music
they pull out the handcuffs
as we pull out the blow
[heidi]
i’m takin the garbage out, when like a torrent

[all]
the lapd comes brandishing a warrant

[heidi]
storm right through my door
find coke in my sock drawer
and traveller checks signed by charlie sheen

[all]
traveller’s checks signed by charlie sheen

[heidi]
four counts of

[all]
pandering, pandering, pandering
pandering, pandering, pandering, pandering

[heidi (spoken) (excluded in recording)]
so, i was thrown intro the back of a police car and i watched my beverly hills home that i worked so hard for disappear into the distance through the back window. i was a wreck, yes, but i had been in the hills long enough to know that there was no such thing as bad publicity. the one thing you don’t want is no publicity. so, imagine my shock when i get out jail the next morning and my arrest is conveyed only through a tiny, tiny little blurb in the la times. i mean, the ziggy comic strip was bigger that day. so, i said fine, if no one will notice, if no one is interested, i, ever thе self promoter, will make thеm interested. this isn’t your average arrest here. this is a story that hollywood, let alone the world, had never seen before. so, i made a little ring to an old friend at the la times and i dropped every salacious detail of this made for primetime story. and she listened…
(she picks up the phone)
hi, i’m calling for shawn hubler. this is heidi fleiss

[all]
pandering, pandering, pandering
pandering, pandering, pandering

[three girls]
soon hollywood is all abuzz

[heidi]
and hungry for a sl+t to shame

[all]
they’re all speculating
and calling and begging
a poor little heidi
to not drop their name
seems billy idol’s not immune
he’s sweating through his underwear

[two girls]
his publicist trips over every response:
says:

[publicist/girl 3]
“there may have been s+x but there was no commerce there”

[heidi]
they’ll say that they hate you, but really, they love you

[three girls]
and even if not, they’re at least thinking of you!

[all]
press circuits cannot fail
so long as you’re on bail
and now the big word on everyone’s lips in hollywood is
pandering
pandering pandering
pandering
pandering pandering
pandering
pandering pandering

- little black book the musical lyrics

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