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lori laitman - against still life lyrics

orange in the middle of a table:
it isn’t enough
to walk around it
at a distance, saying
it’s an orange:
nothing to do
with us, nothing
else: leave it alone

i want to pick it up
in my hand
i want to peel the
skin off; i want
more to be said to me
than just orange:
want to be told
everything it has to say
and you, sitting across
the table, at a distance, with
your smile contained, and like the orange
in the sun: silent:

your silence
isn’t enough for me
now, no matter with what
contentment you fold
your hands together; i want
anything you can say
in the sunlight:
stories of your various
childhoods, aimless journeyings
your loves; your articulate
skeleton; your posturings; your lies
these orange silences
(sunlight and hidden smile)
make me want to
wrench you into saying;
now i’d crack your skull
like a walnut, split it like a pumpkin
to make you talk, or get
a look inside

but quietly:
if i take the orange
with care enough and hold it
gently

i may find
an egg
a sun
an orange moon
perhaps a skull; center
of all energy
resting in my hand

can change it to
whatever i desire
it to be
and you, man, orange afternoon
lover, wherever
you sit across from me
(tables, trains, buses)

if i watch
quietly enough
and long enough

at last, you will say
(maybe without speaking)

(there are mountains
inside your skull
garden and chaos, ocean
and hurricane; certain
corners of rooms, portraits
of great grandmothers, curtains
of a particular shade;
your deserts; your private
dinosaurs; the first
woman)

all i need to know
tell me
everything
just as it was
from the beginning

- lori laitman lyrics

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