loudon wainwright - i wish i was a lesbian lyrics
ok, i’m riding around in this car with this woman i’m
close to a couple times a week.
i’m noticing she’s looking out the window and noticing
other women. how
this one looks, isn’t her hair lovely? what a nice
outfit.
i said “babe, what is the deal!? you’re noticing
all these other chicks. maybe… you’re a lesbian.”
she looks at me and she says “i wish i was a lesbian.”
now, at that point, i wanted to say, “you mean you wish
you were a lesbian” because grammatically… but i let
it slide; i didn’t want to ruffle any feathers. but you
know, that sentence, that retort “i wish i was a
lesbian” kinda stuck in the old lalo’s mind. kinda
gestated there for 7, 8 minutes… and this tune popped
out.
i wish i was a lesbian, and not a hetero.
i wouldn’t have to mess with men and all their come and
go,
and all that awful facial hair and yucky machismo!
oh, i wish i were a lesbian and not a hetero!
i wish i was a lesbian and that i wasn’t straight.
i’d sleep with women only! man, it would be great!
i can throw away my diaphragm, i wouldn’t want to mate!
oh, i wish i was a lesbian, and that i wasn’t straight!
hey!
i wish i was a lesbian; i’d like to be a dyk-.
i would hang with kd lang, mel gibson, take a hike!
i think it would be nice to love someone who was alike.
oh, i wish i was a lesbian; i’d like to be a dyk-!
i wish i was a lesbian, that’s why this song is sung.
it shouldn’t have to matter how someone is hung.
other things are more important- like how you use your
tongue! (blblblbbl!)
i wish i was a lesbian, that’s why this song is sung!
hey!
i dare casey kasem to play this.
i wish i was a lesbian, i know it’s sad but true,
but maybe i would understand you guys and all you do
but if i was a lesbian, i wouldn’t have to!!
oh, i wish i was a lesbian i know it’s sad but true.
hey!
i wish i was a lesbian, and not a hetero.
i wouldn’t have to mess with men and all their come and
go,
and all that awful facial hair and yucky machismo! (i
hate that d-mn machismo!)
i wish i was a lesbian and not a hetero!
i wish i was a lesbian and not a hetero!
i wish i was a lesbian and not a hetero! (blblblblbllb)
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