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macc lads - helen of fowey lyrics

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got me tanktop with the budgie front, party on at vinny’s oxford bags, so i looked a c-nt, but the party’s nearly finished nowt to drink but noilly prat, babycham or snowball nowt to sh-g but something fat on holiday from cornwall the face that lunched on a thousand chips seventeen hairs in the wart on her bottom lip but i knew i had to give it a sh-g, or she’d go home thinking i’m a screaming handbag. didn’t know which way up she was, i said: ‘fart and give us a clue, love.’ she said back at hers she had some beer, ‘and a bottle of clandew, love.’ i got dead p-ssed, she looked quite fit, she looked like someone famous, i fumbled about, but my aim was out, i stuffed it up her -n-s she picked her -rs- as she lay bare, digging out the bits of bogroll in her -n-l hair i knew i had to give it a sh-g, now she’ll go home thinking i’m a screaming handbag

got out of bed to have a p-ss, and something really shocked us, a yellow growth on my bell end, i legged it down the doctor’s this is what you get when you tunnel test, its yellow and deformed; but it wasn’t clap, or owt like that, but a f-cking piece of sweetcorn



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