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madd hatter - there for me lyrics

seeking reassurance, i’m unsure if
they feel the same behind the curtains will something surface?
they say it’s fine but i’m nervous, uncertain
i need the truth it’s very urgent i’m done hurting
even when they say it’s cool i don’t find joy
i start to ponder all the people i might’ve annoyed
by constantly questioning everything, caught in a void
thinking bout relationships that i’ll probably destroy
yea, i’m tryna the calm the distress
but i ruminate till i ain’t got no confidence left
all this doubt, living in fear is why i’m often dеpressed
always tryna stay in control till i’m caught in a wreck
i can’t avoid, guеss i’m tryna protect my own ego
will they perceive me as the failure or the hero
will i be alone or would they wanna keep close
will they misconstrue good intentions with evil
suspense k!lling me slowly
no sleep
klonopin saving me from my own grief
tryna be that special person that they don’t need
left my bullies in the past yet there’s no peace
feel like torture every second that i proceed
into the future still wrestling with the old me
hope leaves as soon as i get a cold sleeve
aiming for perfection i can’t find it in my own dreams
one slip of the tongue and now i’m panicking
wishing i could turn the minute hand back again
trapped within my own thoughts and it’s challenging
to believe they’ll put up with the demons i’ve been battling
tryna mimic the remarks of the champions
replaying conversations in my head that haven’t happened yet
tied to the trauma i just can’t forget
reassurance is the only thing to help me panic less
and even when it’s there it’s never enough
even though they care i never can trust
am i burden that they’re scared to ever discuss?
wonder if the struggles that i share are met with disgust
yea contemplating on a daily
waiting on time to save me
cause i’m going kinda crazy
with no sign of changing
my hopes still remain inside
the h+ll i’ve been caged in
they can’t help me escape it
only i
i see it all on their faces
their words never bring me to complacence
as soon as i’m awake there’s hesitation
how can i face the fear when i avoid confrontation?

- madd hatter lyrics

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