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manika - how can i love lyrics

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[verse 1]
if i confessed to you
that it’s all been a show
my heart is bleeding blue
i can’t stand myself at all
and what i dread the most
is if i let you too close
you’ll see shadows haunting me
and you will leave me ghost

[chorus]
how can i love when i don’t even like me?
how can i love when it feels like i’m drowning?
i can’t escape this overwhelming pain
i wish there was a way i could be saved
how can i love when i don’t even like me?

[verse 2]
i wish there was a way, to open my heart to you
i feel so far away, laying here next to you
so i put on my mask, and i paint on my smile
maybe one day i’ll have the strength to let you see all my scars

[chorus]
how can i love when i don’t even like me?
how can i love when it feels like i’m drowning?
i can’t escape this overwhelming pain
i wish there was a way i could be saved
how can i love when i don’t even like me?

[bridge]
look up and down, i’m surrounded by darkness
demons all around, they’ve turned me into heartless
colder than a glacier
i wish i could erase the hate that i’ve felt and the scars that i have
and i’m drowning in tears, and i’m drowning shame
and i can’t escape my fears or any of this pain
to the girl who stares me in the mirror, don’t let them see who you really are

[chorus]
how can i love when i don’t even like me?
how can i love when it feels like i’m drowning?
i can’t escape this overwhelming pain
i wish there was a way i could be saved
how can i love when i don’t even like me?

how can i love when it’s something i don’t know?
oh no
how can i love when i don’t even like me?

- manika lyrics

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