marc gunn - cuddles mcgish lyrics
i knew an old tomcat named cuddles mcgish
as we were catnapping down by the food dish
and dreaming of catnip and fine tuna+fish
we lay sunning ourselves in the morning
when there came a rottweiler called sergeant mcgrowl
with a mangy old mixture of shih tzu and chow
and a little chihuahua called yippy o’howell
with their muddy loud paws in the morning
says he, “my fine fellows, if you’ll join our pack
we’ll go tromp through the puddles and leave a big track
we’ll tip over the trash+can and rip up the sack
and chase the postman in the morning
for a doggie, he always has a thick bristly coat
and a colorful collar for to hang ’round your throat
and if you should wander, of your tags they’ll take note
to bring you safe home in the morning.”
but says cuddles, “i wouldn’t be proud of your furs
for you smell like old garbage and you look like old curs
and your tails are encrusted with sharp sticker+burrs
that poke at your skin in the morning
and your collars are nothing of which to be proud
for our people correct you when you are too loud
while they only pet us when we have meowed
and they feed us first thing in the morning.”
but the sergeant he barked, “if i hear one more sound
we’ll bare our big t++th and we’ll stomp on the ground
and chase you all over, both upstairs and down
so now you young kitties, take warning!”
but cuddles and me, we whipped out our claws
and we paid our respect to their noses and jaws
so all those dumb pooches, they took to their paws
and ran from us cats in the morning
and the little chihuahua, with his high piercing bark
we jumped on his back and we there left our mark
and clawed him so fierce, you’d think he met a shark
as he ran yipping home in the morning
well, cuddles, he might have continued the chase
but the encounter had put all our fur out of place
so instead we sat down then, to groom face to face
and get back to our naps in the morning
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