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mat4yo - facts machine lyrics

let’s see what you got
it’s like that, is it?
facts

i’m a kind of psychonautic +n+lyst boy
eating lightly salted hyperbolic paraboloids
playing with my hundred thousand sonic character toys
and now i’m screaming how a diatomic can’t be alloys
’cause they’re metals, but i can gas the scene
and add reams to the fact rapper magazine
so let me open the lid, pour some history in
and then scan this beat like a facts machine

did you know
that knowing that you don’t know anything’s a socratic paradox?
how do i know? because i wonder a lot
like a nomadic pair of socks
so let me hop in my time machine and come back with
mortimer, ogilvie and jumpman
from the past and i’ll ask them
if you never changed your names
do you think that you’d all still be classics?

did you know
poe wrote the raven
but i think he should have thought further
’cause crows are known for the grudges they hold
and i hear that a group of ’em really can murder
nursery rhymes aren’t sugar nor spice
they’re a perjury by mother goose with her lies
and if you ever wanna ring around the rosie
you might be singing ’bout the plague that has cursed you to die
motherese is a language only babies speak
play my music for your fetus after eighteen weeks
cut the lower frequencies so the bass don’t peak
mauna kea is our tallest mountain, measured base to peak
a coffee bean is a seed, you buffoon!
peanuts aren’t peas nor nuts, but legumes
and it’s true that tomatoes are actually fruits
and potatoes have more chromosomes than a human
the last supper came when the bread broke
but judas wasn’t pleased, ’cause he wanted more dough
then he gained a couple pounds turning friend to a foe
he was thirsty for blood and, in the end, choked
but the first supper served up a question that goes:
did the chicken or the egg come first? or did both?
well, the chicken’s ancestors laid many an egg yolk
with a hundred ways to cook it, just check a chef’s toque
french toast is another one that’s up for debate
does it come from the country or a cook’s last name?
either way, it’s capitalized unlike french fries
’cause they’re titled by the cut, not the person or the place
if you’re blue in the face, that’s methemoglobinemia
not anemia, that’s when hemoglobin’s leaving ya
need to stop the bleeding? then you better clean the lesion
and to keep that heart beating, eat some premium magnesium!

america is not a democracy
yeah, that came out awkwardly..
the pure definition sounds good in commonspeak
but here’s what would happen if it’s implemented properly:
democracy is two wolves and a sheep
taking a vote on which one to eat
the majority rules, and sure, that’s fine
but it never will protect the minority’s rights
the sheep can’t show all the wolves his side
’cause that lamb’s getting chopped by the end of the night
and the founders knew this would be the demise
of a brand new country trying to survive
so instead of being kings ruling high in a tower
they armed citizens with that power
kept the individual’s rights, and they dubbed it
a constitutionally representative republic
and the public’s creations are tagged with
a ten+year trademark or twenty+year patent
and don’t try to copy a copyright
until seventy years after the author dies
then it’s fair to use in the public domain
but it’s just not the same as the public airwaves
they are static in nature and can’t be changed
so the fcc said “get out the way!”
any broadcast station can license the sp+ce
as long as they read through our rules and obey
like making their kind of programs resonate
with the people whose airwaves they pay to vibrate
so dial into my station and blast that
check the stats with bmi or ascap
it’s a fact the eternal fire in iraq
can’t hold a candle to the fire of my raps! (uh!)
and that flame turns white when it’s hotter
frankenstein’s the doctor, not the monster
some of these facts seem quite cliché
but even broken clocks are right twice a day
time flies when you wish it would freeze
and it seems to slow down when you try to add speed
i’ll have graduated high school and gotten two degrees
between kingdom hearts 3’s announcement and release
(fact!)

- mat4yo lyrics

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