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max himbigger - straight outta cyrodiil (original) lyrics

[ guard ] stop! you’ve violated the law! it’s been too long since i’ve seen a good brawl! i’m just warming up, you pathetic worm! hurrr! remember the emperor!

you dare attack me? i’m warning you! show me what you’ve got! that the best you can do? can’t you settle this peacefully? you elves are all the same, all flash, no fury!

guards! guards! someone’s being attacked! hey! are you some kinda…maniac? this is the part where you bleed to death! it’s over lawbreaker! you’re under arrest!

you’ll make a fine pair of boots! by the gods! there’s a psychopath on the loose! i’ve fought mudcrabs more fearsome than you! you dare oppose the might of+ hmm

[ guard ] help! you there! stop! help! come to me!

[adoring fan] wow! you’re the grand champion! i saw your fight! you’re the best! can i follow you around? yes! can i carry your weapon? can i shine your boots? golly, you’re the best!

let’s go! hm? oh, well, i guess i can do that. i won’t get in the way! whatever you say! i’m going to f+++ you and ++ you and worship your ++ for days!

[ guard and adoring fan] oomf! stop! ahh! stop! ahh… stop! i’m cumming! no! oooooooooooooo d+mn you! oh, thank you! you’re just too kind! hmph! no more needed for me! that’s too bad… oh! anything to pleasure you! hey, come on now! there’s no need to+ haa! huhn! oof! hurrehureh everybody’s happy…( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) what did i ever do to you?! you’re the grand champion! you’re pathetic! aw, gee… you sure? you filthy n+ okay…well i’ll be hanging around the arena grounds if you need someone to worship your c+++. bye!

- max himbigger lyrics

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