micah callari - i don't know how it ends lyrics
(verse)
i don’t know how it ends
will it end with a car crash and a single held+out synth note
i don’t know how it ends
suddenly and without warning, will my end be nice and slow
i don’t know how it ends
why do i even bother ‘cause nothing that i do will matter
i don’t know how it ends
‘cause destiny’s not served on a shining silver platter
(pre+chorus)
it’s quite disconcerting
does the end bring on hurting
will i end up converting
could they help with numbing
six months, death forthcoming
or should i expect nothing
(chorus)
i don’t know how it ends
do i get a chance to make amеnds
will my words be lost in tears
are thеse just irrational fears
(spoken interlude)
i don’t want to die, really. there’s been periods of my life where i wouldn’t have cared if death came early, and there’s been a moment or two where i seeked death out myself, but this? right now? this moment right now… it isn’t one of them. right now, i’m not in a bad place… sure, my ocd’s been terrible the past couple weeks, and i’ve been dealing with a ton of anxiety about, like, almost everything i do for a long time now, but i’m definitely better than i was before. i have friends. i have my family, my mom, my dad, my siblings. they’re patient about me and my daily struggles with autism, and pans, and eds, and all the other funny acronyms i’ve been diagnosed with over the years. i’ve finally weeded out all the toxic people who’ve controlled way too much of my daily life in the past. i’m taking initiative and control over myself. and i think, after all these years, i’m finally starting to truly understand what it means to live
(chorus)
i don’t know how it ends
do i get a chance to make amends
will my words be lost in tears
are these just irrational fears
i don’t know how it ends (this is sincerely me)
do i get a chance to make amends (sincerely me, sincerely me)
will my words be lost in tears (sincerely me, sincerely me)
are these just irrational fears (sincerely me, sincerely me)
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