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michael b. allen - my ugly white straight reality lyrics

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maybe i’m evil
i used to point and stare at all the ugly people
until my tears from mirrors and fears were all but lethal
thought i’d never. now i have

and all that art makes
a hole the size of babylon but in a star shape
the higher up the more i drown down through that heartache
afraid of everything i am

was never good at giving up
may as well take down my name
it’d be nice to rise above
but i don’t have the time to wait
if i can’t be the one you love
i’ll be the one you love to hate

i felt so conscious
awake, enabled to embrace my inner conscience
and take the pill that made me honestly dishonest
unswallowed up by who’s to say

and i had reasons
before i ripped em all to shreds and k!lled my thesis
because it tore me up into a million pieces
that state+was+never+ment to stay
was never good at giving up
may as well take down my name
it’d be nice to rise above
but i don’t have the time to wait
if i can’t be the one you love
i’ll be the one you love to hate

things i once believed and dreamed that used to come so freely feel so hard+earned
once pristine i lived to be a hero. now i’d die to be a martyr
if i knew what’s worth dying for

i want you to know me
affirm my existential crisis and console me
and tell me even though i’m dreadful i’m not lonely
but you don’t even know my name

so i’ll stay haunted
by lack of admiration i won’t say i wanted
and talent i try to hide just enough to flaunt it
i’m at a loss to play their game

was never good at giving up
so may as well take down my name
and it’d be nice to rise above
but i don’t have the time to wait
if i can’t be the one you love
i’ll be the one you love to hate

- michael b allen lyrics

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