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michael friedman - horrible seders lyrics

before we start, i have to say:
i think being jewish was invaluable preparation for being g-y
my mother was from a bronx jewish labour union family
and so you didn’t take sh-t from anybody

in a small southern town with 100 jewish families
a mostly baptist town, with this solid minority…
in a secular, pluralist democracy
you don’t take sh-t from anybody

when i came out my father and i would have these terrible fights
cause it was hard for him to deal with the news
i’d talk about ident-ty, and politics, and human rights
and being jewish was the metaphor i’d use
when he said “ok, it’s too bad that you are a h-m-s-xual
but do you have to tell everyone – oy, and upset your aunt?”
and i’d say “why don’t have you have your nose cut off and change your name to brown, and become a goy? you can’t!”
and my father and i got past the anger later
but that’s how i used to shut down my family seder
talk about being g-y and upsetting my aunt lucy

but g-ys and jews sort of arrive knowing how to be unpopular
and turn it into a source of power and not feel condemned
because society condemns us
and also: a belief that justice triumphs

pharaoh doesn’t win! pharaoh doesn’t win!
in the long run the righteous are triumphant!
even if the wicked seem to be winning at the moment

but a house so big has a room for you in it somewhere if you want
a house this big has a room for you in it somewhere if you want

and you have to understand the messiah is not arriving tonight
not tonight, if you think otherwise you’re wrong
you have to be ready, you have to be prepared, but you also have to know it could be very, very long

i think the reason we’re so smart as a people is that the religion is such an imponderably difficult task
it can’t be mastered, it’s infinitely receding with every question that you ask

the talmudic tradition is literally, to me, an embrace of the tradition of being at sea

but a sea so big has a boat for you in it somewhere if you want
a boat this big has a place for you in it somewhere if you want

my partner mark’s father’s mother minnie moskovitz –
a russian jew, and just an ogre, just terrific –
and mark’s mother harriet was polish, catholic, when she first married she wanted to impress minnie so she made this huge seder meal and at the end to make a toast minnie moskovitz said:
“i’m deeply moved that my new daughter-in-law, the enemy of my people, has made this beautiful meal for the seder while my ungrateful children have done nothing.”

but a seder so big has a chair for you in it, just like minnie moskovitz said, it isn’t peaceful. peaceful – what is that? peaceful is boring and dead

and now i’ve taken over my family’s seder the last two years – it’s turned into this terrible free-for-all
i’ve got a cousin who’s a doctor and we’ve both of us become
since the second intifada, just apoplectic
and like most seders, when the subject comes up
it just turns into this terrible free-for-all
people yelling and screaming and just wonderful

and clearly no one who isn’t insane could really argue that
god adheres to one faith and not to another
if there is a god and i’m agnostic so i just don’t know

but a house so big has a room for you in it somewhere if you want
and i’ve found a couple i feel comfortable in
but one thing that judaism teaches you, you never can stop thinking
even when your life’s in danger, every seder that you host, every home that you make
your connection to god has to stay alive
and you’re never let off the hook from that, ever

pharoah cannot win
pharoah cannot
in the long run, the righteous have to triumph
(don’t they?)
even if the wicked seem to be winning all the time

- michael friedman lyrics

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