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mikelwj - dear diary lyrics

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(“dear diary
today was a long day in school and i haven’t really eaten anything yet today
but i guess that’s good
i just wanted to write something real quick before i go off to bed”)
so here it goes:

dear diary

i’m fourteen and i always feel so nervous
tell me why is it that everyone is so perfect
while i feel so worthless, and they look so happy
while lately for me, my mood has been so cr-ppy

and i have come to believe all the things that i’m seeing
on magazines and tv, of every single perfect being
all the girls with perfect bodies, and such amazing skin
oh how i would k!ll to live the life that they are in

i’ve been trying to lose weight over that past couple of weeks
throwing up after meals, on the rare times that i eat
but that isn’t enough, i still need to do much more
to get this guy to notice me, people wonder what for

there’s so much room in my tummy that it isn’t funny
i don’t wanna be people’s dummy, but either way i feel dumpy
most of the time i am left here, thinking to myself
oh god is this worth it, or do i need some help
like:

i’ve been used by guys, i’ve been hurt by girls
i’ve been hit by my mom, and cursed by the world
so i keep losing weight, just trying to be perfect
i’m waiting for somebody to tell me that i’m worth it

you’re not alone(repeat 16x)

i’m twenty-three and just ran across my old diary
i opened it up but i really don’t know what inspired me
to do this, but i was instantly in tears
to think of how lost i was during those young years

and that guy that i mentioned back when i was fourteen
he’s my fiancé now; i guess that i’m living a dream
we got a small house, a nice car and a good life
but my arms are still scarred from using my own knife

but he accepts me how i am, and he knows about my past
and after all that, he still says that we’re gonna last
and i love him, i love him, i love him with all my heart
i honestly couldn’t take it if we ever got pulled apart

if i could say one thing to me at age fourteen
it would be that you’ll find a guy who will treat you like a queen
it gets better than it is, don’t worry about your size
and never think you’re alone, someone out there hears your cries
saying:

i’ve been used by guys, i’ve been hurt by girls
i’ve been hit by my mom, and cursed by the world
so i keep losing weight, just trying to be perfect
i’m waiting for somebody to tell me that i’m worth it

you’re not alone(repeat 16x)

- mikelwj lyrics

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