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mirabai kukathas - on the playground lyrics

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i was never good at monkey bars
i was never good at running
i was never good at being loved back
but i still thought you were so stunning

i thought you were like an angel from up high
and i was just a canary in a coal mine

all i ever wanted was somebody to love
i wished on every shooting star up above me
but when we played house
i played the stairs
and you walked all over my spine
and i said “hey, at least i’m included
you didn’t have to be so kind”

but now i have your footprints on my back
they hurt when i’m having an asthma attack
but i’m sure that you had your reasons for pushing me down
on the playground

i was never good at seeking you out
but i was even worse at hiding
i was never good at getting angry
so i never got the hang of fighting
i thought you could give me some purpose
but you hurt me
don’t think it was on purpose

all i ever wanted was somebody to like me
to think i was funny and to not want to fight me
but when we played house
i played the stairs
and you walked all over my spine
and i said “hey, at least i’m included
you didn’t have to be so kind”

but now i have your footprints on my back
they hurt when i’m having a panic attack
but i’m sure that you had your reasons for pushing me down
on the playground

and i am sorry for being so annoying
so saccharine and cloying
and i am sorry for crying and for telling
for singing and rebelling

and now when we play house i ask to be the stairs
and i offer you my spine
and you say “hey, that’s so considerate
how are you so kind?”
cause now i crave your footprints on my back
walk on me or i’ll have a heart attack
and i forgive all your reasons for pushing me down
on the playground

- mirabai kukathas lyrics

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