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modest - aftermath lyrics

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[chorus]

waking up i notice i’m still alive
in my mind, all the time i visited suicide
i was young just a rebel living his life
keeping my head high, 8 flying a kite
i’m alive, i’m surprised i’m still alive
i’m surprised i’m still alive x3

[verse 1]

used to have, macaroni for dinner
only one vehicle, so it was walking on winter
going to school, still feeling like i was winning
academically gifted and never got into distance
always completed work and that was really the mission
came home, and notice a different vibe
it was periodically different just felt like i should cry
but i can’t, cause a young age i knew it be better
but things change like the weather
laying in bed feeling the first signs
my brother was way too quite, so i just laid to the side
daddy ain’t home, im just wondering where he’s at?
is he thinking about us or is he drinking jack?
is he thinking of changing will he ever come back?
i don’t know, understanding was hard
only 8 years old and momma losing her job
laid off for a minute sucks i couldn’t do nothing at all

[chorus]

waking up i notice i’m still alive
in my mind, all the time i visited suicide
i was young just a rebel living his life
keeping my head high, 8 flying a kite
i’m alive, i’m surprised i’m still alive
i’m surprised i’m still alive x3

[verse 2]

dreams of being bigger and visioning her applause
when i become the greatest with no worries at all
house paid, new cars and food to feed us all
i’m feeling a little yeezy why am i so appalled
when i make 4 figures and i drive my own car
i travel every weekend, top floors i’m feeling tall
and no one seems to call i think i’m buried alive
i’m just visioning the now and moving forward in life
i look at myself now and notice that i survived
i’m gone, i just wanna make them proud
so put the speakers up loud
and follow me as a crowd
don’t matter who you are, believed me or ever doubted
i’m surrounded by these visions of having precious surroundings
goddam,goddam
in a different dimension, with ac for summer
and different colored picket fences
woke up from a lucid adolescents
my god

[chorus]

waking up i notice i’m still alive
in my mind, all the time i visited suicide
i was young just a rebel living his life
keeping my head high, 8 flying a kite
i’m alive, i’m surprised i’m still alive
i’m surprised i’m still alive x3

[break 2]

i know, i feel i’m buried alive
keeping my head high not thinking of suicide
i know, i gotta keep it alive
roll it, light it, inhale it now your gone for the night



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