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monty python - the ferret song lyrics

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i can see a bare-bottomed mandrill
slyly eyeing his upper nostril
if he jumps inside there too
i really won’t know what to do
i’ll be a proud possessor of a kind of nasal zoo
a nasal zoo
i’ve got a ferret sticking up my nose
and what is worse it constantly explodes
ferrets don’t explode you say
but it happened nine times yesterday
and i should know ’cause each time
i was standing in the way
i’ve got a ferret sticking up my nose
i’ve got a ferret sticking up my nose
how it got there i can’t tell
but now it’s there it hurts like h-ll
and what is more it radically affects
my sense of smell



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