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monzy - the pimping lemma lyrics

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i glanced up from my terminal and saw suzanne;
she looked hotter than a gpu without a cooling fan
cause when a girl walks in the lab with an itty bitty waist
and she pulls an inspiron out her laptop case
and she opens vi and she starts to code
i wanna work her like some ciphertext in cfb mode

i said “honey, have you got dynamic loading support?
cause i think i have a package for you to import.”
she’s like, “mmm yeah, but is your package extensible?”
in the face of my charisma she’s completely indefensible;
so i jot down her digits and her email addresses
and that night she’ll be responding to my intimate caresses

when it comes to females, there’s no end to my thirst
i’ll pull off their panties and search ’em depth first
but i have one rule, and at times it’s a dilemma
it’s a policy i like to call my “pimping lemma”:
i like hoes of all colors, shapes sizes and religions
but i only fill my harem with computer science pigeons

when i’m rolling up a blunt or i’m unrolling a loop
rolling back a transaction, or rolling round in my coupe
when i’m poppin’ the cris or just drinking some forties
i can’t get enough of them computer science shorties

i saw brenda in the club and she gave me a wink;
she looked hotter than a dual core without a heatsink
i said “get krunk girl, come on and twurk it
move that -ss until it makes a hamiltonian circuit.”
and she could twist her body into sixty s-xy positions
but she couldn’t debug those tricky race conditions

between the sheets i must admit that she was quite a freak
but every time she used the heap she would create a memory leak
she had dumps like a truck but she was dumber than a brick;
the smartest thing that ever came out of her mouth was my d-ck
so i applied the pimping lemma and i ditched that b-tch quick
cause you know i’ll only creep with a computer science chick

when i’m tokin’ on a spliff or tokenizing a string
these hoes keep coming to me faster than a millisecond ping
but you can keep your movie stars and your playboy bunnies
cause you know i only roll with hot computer science honeys

i’m acc-mulating cuties from across the nation
pull ’em in like neighbors in a delaunay triangulation
i got hoes from different area codes and ip ranges
swap ’em round like vmms making page exchanges
yeah i round ’em up like ceil() and i add ’em to my stable
and i offer them a spliff from off my hash table

i pick up women wearin’ gucci, prada, and fendi an’
when they see my msb they’re like “d-mn, you’re big endian!”
they wanna hit that high bit and eat my meat like carnivores
going down like i was calling p and they was semaph0r-s
i push all the right keys like ampersands and underscores
and soon another freaky cs ho is down on all fours

i gotta flush the tlb when i make context switches;
gotta brush off the ladies if they ain’t cs b-tches;
gotta check the error number case my system call fails
and i gotta roll exclusively with cs females

mya’s love is like wo, but i’m sorry, i won’t
toya wonders if “i do” but she can’t code so “i don’t,”
beyonce’s crazy in love, but i just ain’t enticed
j-lo’s love don’t cost a thing but that sh-t’s still overpriced
milian can dip it low but she can’t flip those dip switches
and that’s why i only mack on fly computer science b-tches

i got a pimped out pc and a pimped out ride
and if you p-ss the cs quals i might let you inside
but if not you’ll get a 403: access denied
cause there’s a pimping lemma by which i must abide

i can’t help it when i see a fine computer science ho
my whole heart expands faster than a google ipo
i got such mad game that there ain’t no defiance
and i’m scoring for stanford like bonds for the giants
yo, i spread around my seed like swarms of bittorrent clients
but i only mack on honeys who are in computer science

so you can shake it like a polaroid or like a salt shaker
you can shake that laffy taffy or shake your money maker
you can show off your milkshake or shake ya tailfeather
but as long as you a cs girl, let’s shake it together

- monzy lyrics

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