new fossils - valentina lyrics
a couple midnights back
i called you from
a parking lot relapse
manic and fussed
you begged and pled with me
“don’t do something stupid”
i turned my phone off turned
the engine on
and climbed the asphalt curves
til my car stopped
on highway seventeen
underneath the moon this
is my gethsemane
and i’m my own judas
you intervened from my pocket
drove out and called off the guards
then you managed to convince
me down from the precipice
and got me into your car
sorry for having a breakdown
sorry for frantic phone calls
sorry i couldn’t surmount
all my frustration self doubt
all of my vices and flaws
sorry for crashing at your house
when everybody had gone
sorry for my broken vows
sorry for suicide counts
sorry for ruining prom
valentina know i let my
boutonniere wilt by the bedside
so that as the time comes when i
wither and fade away
that night will do the same
a few years back i start
-ed counting days
and kept my tally marks
with razorblades
though i’ve spent so long clean
i still hear the sirens
their coaxing melodies
bring me to submission
oh, what a waste of a blood clot
oh, what a waste of a fight
oh, what a waste of resolve
when all i saved is now scrawled
across the porcelain tile
but i’m not wasting a blood clot
i’m gonna put up a fight
i’m gonna heal up my scars
i’m gonna stare down the stars
and tear apart the moonlight
there’s a permanent means to
get out from beneath this moon
though i’ve spent so long clean
i still hear the sirens
their coaxing melodies
bring me to submission
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