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nick xl - stains lyrics

[hook]
i just hope i change it ’round now
i been goin through the same things
i just hope i leave the house now
ill prolly stay in and just make things
+i been workin through the same drought
prayin for rain
my sh+t grayed out
im adding the stains
ill prolly make it out
some other way
get the paint out
im gonna change

rebel since i was a kid+ my mother went into work
she said+ “theres a test” she had written in big
i skipped it just like i did church
its like every d+mn time i feel responsibility
i feel my heart beating out of my throat hole
feel like i just swallowed my throat whole
so i just been wandering, no goal
and i tried the public, i fumbled and f+cked it up
i couldn’t focus, it swallowed my soul, though
now i just feel aimless and cold
i put all of my efforts to tuning my vocals
and as a kid i was lazy
skipped a shower that turned into months
id devour my food in a minute
i turned all of my sorrow to lunch
pushed my insecurities outward
picked up rap as a way to be tough
i fake im a saint, im a coward
i wonder when ill have enough
and i dont like my own reflection
im betting the day that i crack it is soon
been inside, i ghosted my complexion
better brain+dead with my breath in a tube
i just been waiting for lightning
to strike me and lift me up off this seat
but i panic, i know that my canvas is blank
but its better to stain it then leave it in peace
i been so scared of the same things
it never occurred just to change
better/worse now im turning the page
break a curse, and converting my stains

[hook]
i just hope i change it ’round now
i been goin through the same things
i just hope i leave the house now
ill prolly stay in and just make things
+i been workin through the same drought
prayin for rain
my sh+t grayed out
im adding the stains
ill prolly make it out
some other way
get the paint out
im gonna change

- nick xl lyrics

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