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no coast rap battles - diggy splash vs michael white lyrics

[round 1: michael white]
y’all wanna know why they call him diggy splash?
’cause that’s what it sounds like when i dig in that -ss
this ain’t a video game, b-tch, i ain’t pausing sh-t
if you was in a g-y gang, your gang name would be the johnson clique
but you a lesbian hoe, huh?
a b-tch that likes females
so i want you and your chick to suck my d-ck
while i’m getting a pedicure at lee nails
if you want me to stop sodomizing you on the beach
then stop bending over picking up seash-lls
he my bottom b-tch, on the block he flip p-ssy quick
that’s why his nickname is “she sells”
but your mama p-ssy got that blowhole
uh-huh, she got that mean whale
i make that cl-t spin like a free wheel
i make that b-tch scream like a sh-m-l-
uh, uh! shut up, b-tch, before you wake up your daughter
if you don’t know what that means
it means that he’s the only child and i’m the father
i’ll dry slide in your mama like schlitterbahn with no water
i’ll dig up eazy-e from the grave and make him f-ck you with no rubber
yeah, i said it
i’ll make him give you that danny with no glover
now maybe [?] jealous, i’m o.j. simpson, cold-blooded
n0body knows you in this generation, joe budden
ain’t that a breakfast on a b-tch
look at him, look at him
you look like a homeless person that got all dressed up
to go on a date with a three-year-old kid
you look like you just got raped by jesus christ
and then he made you wear his wig
i bet if i did a backflip on your mama’s p-ssy
you wouldn’t care if i did
i bet if god didn’t make you a human being
you would have been a puppy humping d-ck
and puppies don’t even go around humping d-cks
so that wouldn’t make no f-cking sense
i came to missouri to put you out your misery, b-tch
easy, easy!

[round 1: diggy splash]
i am homeless and i did get dressed up for a date
that was for your daughter, f-ggot
that’s a flip – f-ck it
you sound like cookie monster got throat aids
you sound like i had a chili dinner and then had no rolaids
you look like the dude from coldplay except mo’ g-y
when you get a s-xt message it means your boyfriend wants swordplay
i had s-x with chuck norris and came in his beard
only then i told him to put on a skirt and give me a beer
this f-ggot wears a towel because he’s always swaying
for you people on the internet that don’t know
this f-ggot smell like estrogen
your shirt’s so big that sh-t would fit on a f-cking elephant
it’s no wonder that you claim to be celibate
i don’t like the way that you look
you look like a common crook
i went to a bookstore and almost bought a book – call time after i say this
i almost bought a book about f-ggots so i could do some f-cking research

[round 2: michael white]
diggy diggy diggy, can’t you see?
sometimes your splash just hypnotize me
and i just love your splashy waves
i guess that’s why your [?] swallow so much [?], b-tch
i bet you like to put bumblebees in your pants
to make your p-ssy look like bubble wrap
pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, [?] popcorn–ss b-tch
your mama told me i got that wonder [?]
then i told her she got that thunder back
and after we got done exchanging nicknames
i got nervous so i whooped her -ss
boom, boom, boom, that’s what it sounds like when i’m in public
and i don’t even leave big footprints
that’s what it sounds like when i’m barefooted
tell me why he gonna rap doing belly flops on whoopee cushions
if he was a douchebag, he would come equipped with a p-ssy cushion
’cause you soft, and you lost
like a baby tornado in the middle of a salad, i think he got tossed
if he played on the addams family
he wouldn’t be the hand, he would be the mouth
ding-dong! you rang? yo, where that mouth at?
[?] later, now i’m screaming “where that towel at?”
’cause a messy motherf-cker like me gotta clean up all that
i bet you like to get f-cked by a ball bat
you like baseball? you like babe ruth?
i bet you like losing at wall ball ’cause you like b-lls hitting your lap – hitting your back
he hates songs that mention “i got my back against the wall”
’cause he can’t relate to it
’cause he like his back away from the wall with me facing it, raping it
no coast battle league taping it
“i hate when you talk about nasty stuff
can you not talk about nasty stuff?”
make me, b-tch
[?]

[round 2: diggy splash]
i saw michael white blowing nine guys for a side of fire – of fries at five guys
i’m leaning on this houston f-ggot ’cause i’m feeling sideways
you make me wanna buy an island
far away where n0body can find it
preferably one that’s lacking some kind of vital vitamin
come over here
that way i’ll know you’ll never survive in it
i’m gonna get wasted and tell you i’ll give you a ride
and when i get to the car, tell you there’s no way i can drive this
so i’m gonna throw you the keys but i’m gonna tie a kite to them
and do a rain dance and hope you get struck by lightning
what else do i got to say to you?
i got some more sh-t
something that rhymes with lightning, probably
come here
since i’m gonna rhyme with lightning
a b-tch couldn’t find your d-ck, it’s the size of a cl-t
hold on, i’m not done yet
yo, if this guy said that he had a big d-ck, i’d bet a million –
if this guy said he had a big d-ck i would he was lying
at first glance i know he’s not good at understanding sizes
that shirt wasn’t measured by the yard, that sh-t was measured by the mileage
the [?] in your shirt could have been measured by my d-ck

- no coast rap battles lyrics

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