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not nearly - one day my wounds will stop healing (weak) lyrics

i don’t want to die
not here, not now, in this hospital bed
stay here by my side
so much harder to let go of the thread
never losing hope
hospice walls talk, coax me into sleeping
never letting go
weaving my thoughts, close my eyes and agree
l!cking my wounds ‘till my blood’s running grey
this world is not your friend, mind is begging for the end
getting harder to pretend, body’s giving up again
in spirit we’re connected and skipping through the stations
to witness the menagerie of our own creation
i’m fragile on the inside, time only knows my weakness
i’m lured to the bitter end with promises of sweetness
my body is a vessel from consciousness to death
manifesting over decades and lifeless in a second
k!ll ourselves in rapture, get to heaven faster
you’re sick and it cures you, you’re not and it makes you
the fear in your brain and the places it takes you
not what you’re thinking, never that easy
exit’s an entrance, never escaping
depression suppressing, you’re not addressing
the fear in your brain that you’re never expressing
festers inside you, happily guides you
paths of destruction, cruel world provides you
do not trust a soul in this world
live your precious life, keep this problem quiet
share love like a well, keep your pain to yourself
(i don’t want to die alone)
live your precious life, keep this problem quiet
share love like a well, then f+cking drown yourself
don’t wanna know
(desperate to feel anything at all)
what happens when i stop breathing?
what happens when my heart stops beating?
if i lose myself completely
don’t wanna know, never
oh mighty landlord, evict me from this body
all the sand falling downward, the pain branching outward, accepting and regretting
i don’t want to die
stay here by my side
never losing hope
never letting go
everybody suffers alone in the end

- not nearly lyrics

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