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not sure - euterpe lyrics

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[verse 1: not sure]
self+worth
pushing myself ‘til a bell curve
manifests
but it slides down like a finger on a guitar neck
if i let it depend on my output
like i am
a resume on two legs
exist of nothing but stats
thus all the more there is to neglect
like how are u doing?
i’m clueless
not even sure of that what i’m pursuing
the vision of wooing crowds
it is ruined
a trillion things out i’d rather do than
sit down and watch the computer maneuver some sounds not coming through and
i’ve become helen keller to the music
chasing the rockefellers through the music
sh+t is polluted
i need healing
not a band+aid for the bruises
need a text message from the muses
they still out there
they was snoozing
the amus+m+nt
in a freefall
god this park seems outta use
how to fix this thing broken
its cracks are estranged from my eyes
it’s all in my head
might be that i gotta take a step back
sit down and relax
who gives a f+ck whether if i’m on track?
[verse 2: not sure]
self+worth
depending on someone else
how the heck is that self+worth?
my whole construct
proves fraudulent
like i myself am not the author
i’m a puppet and they is my masters
(you ain’t sh+t if they straw is the longest)
f+cking nonsense
i am not defined by a check mark on a target
check check
did i sell my heart for a
check check
i didn’t even got
for the restlessness
for the s+xless
check mate
lucy i’m a wreck
bless me with evidence of euterpe’s being
that she just catching her breath
send her the message i’m happy to act as her brown paper bag
(god bring her back to me!)
i
i learned my lesson
did my atonement
hollow like never before
i’m a hypocrite
i’m a counterfeit
but i beg you
i didn’t know!
these vices are tightened
i try to fight them
(i swear!)
but my instincts lack retina
money
power
slipping through the ocular
that the ongoing human virus
but i ain’t buying
that is, i’m trying
there’ll be bends, folds
keep the iron plugged
let the steam dry all the bad blood
may we get along
like the old days on the yamaha
i apologize
you came second
i was the tonica
decrescendo
you know no good in just one of us
[outro: christine maria (starring as euterpe)]
heeding your call
don’t apologize
if you need time
just take your time
i’ll be by your side
when you’re ready
whenever you’re ready

[post+outro: not sure]
i need a drink



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