ohitika - light in the attic lyrics
remember when i was a clown
no one respected inside of my town
i would stay locked in my room for a minute
but now when the word got around
all of my enemies telling me
“you know we down for the cause and we sticking around”
yeah
remember the time when you pulled out the stainless and told me to not make a sound
i never had no friends
focused on goals till the kid make an m
now i stay cool in my circle
while they always doubting the kid the plan
got me to thinking a lot of you n-gg-s
ain’t f-cking around the fam
now when they see me
they stick to the talking
like i never got in hand
going the 4 on the floor
i used to count out my days and of course
i would just sit in my room
with a blade to my wrist
and i’m thinking of course
i should of ended it all
na i’m not a b-tch
i would just write out my pain in the pad
to the point that it wouldn’t exist
f-ck
f-ck around and i’m thinking that i should of told all these bih what a feeling
remember that time when i bought me a benzo so i can ignore what i’m feeling
when i got hit with that bad luck
no one in sight with the facts cuz
i was too sunk in my own thoughts
i was just caught up in road blocks
thinking the weight of the world on my shoulder
but now we just bigger boulders
i was that kid in the back of the cl-ss with my raps deep inside of my folders
i used to think
i was the man
and i would just flex on the gram
i would stay locked in my room for a minute
until i just had me a plan
hanging around in my town with these n-gg-s
that never showed me what i could
hanging around in my town with these losers
they claiming a gang
that ain’t cool
i used to throw it baggies and charge them for 20’s and brought it to school
remember that time we bagged in point 5 and we acted a fool
going around in days when i’m caught in drama you acting okay
but how can i built up right off of the lies that you tell me
girl that’s not okay
but how did you know all the scars on body?
you counted like stars in the sp-ce
i – i wanted keys to the safe
you – you wanted keys to the wraith
and how did you know that i’m focused on figures
remind me to pull off like triggers
remind to my stick to myself when my haters get smaller my pockets get bigger
i just wanna build me a castle for all of my homies
that’s word to my wooo!!!
i can not sleep cause i focused on putting the work im growing it bigger
going the 4 on the floor
i used to count out my days of course
i would just sit in my room
with a blade to my wrist
and i’m thinking of course
i should of ended it all
na i’m not a b-tch
i would just write out my pain in the pad
to the point that it wouldn’t exist
everybody got them fears
everybody got that clear?
yeah!
everybody drop them tears
everybody know i’m here
yeah!!!
everybody want them gold
everybody do what told
yeah!
everybody got control of nothing b-tch your life was sold
they want a part what i’m making
all of the chance that i’m taking
thinking back nights in the bas-m-nt
thinking back friends wouldn’t stay when
i was dead broke on my face man
didn’t really have hope in that place man
i down little cold in my lonely
now i gotta a little lit and they know me!
lil bih u can’t be homie
you don’t even know lies they told me
you don’t even know times they told me
little kid you won’t be nothing!!!!!
thinking back that really sunk in
thinking back they words mean nothing
now i’m that kid, when i just pull up my whole clique be stunting
i think i’m afraid of commitment
and showing the world what i’m feeling
all of my life
all of my life i’ve been ducking emotions i’m feeling for women
maybe it’s me
i’m not a kid with a dream
i’m just a boy that never got over the fact that i’ll never be free from the sh-t that i went through when i was a teen
mama i’m stuck in dream
mama can you help me see
mama can you be the light in my attic
that friction to static
the reason why i haven’t taken my life because you let me have it
don’t you see heavens above us and that i might not focus on just being honest
we may not see it the same
i promise that they gon’ remember the name
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