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okaga - what remains of victor cole lyrics

now i’m here what’s your fear found ur lies brother u weren’t there. in disguise on the peer watching time go on by your head now i’m here

victor was the middle man the one centre of this ball, he thinks hes so important in the grand scheme of it all, he’s hung up on all his pride he prays to his pale walls, he’s strangled by all his lies and he will never make that call cause victor is strong and stubborn he was raised in different ways, thе juxtaposition of his childhood relays on his actions his thoughts how articulates his days his thought process provokеs the darkest tortures in arrays

i’m here what’s your fear found ur lies brother u weren’t there. in disguise on the peer watching time go on by your head
now i’m here what’s your fear found ur lies brother u weren’t there. in disguise on the peer watching time go on by your head now i’m here

victors a damaged soul, he knows that sh+t don’t fix when u come from a broken home, this unrequited dear love is something he doesn’t know, he gos and cuts off course connections cause he hasn’t been exposed, and he knows the life he lived has left its lost it’s good as gone, he creates this fiction fantasy’s he’s not truly alone, he can’t create a bond cause he will never let it go, he has detachment issues that have never been resolved
he can’t go out to eat cause he’s seen just what he’s seen cause reals realising everybody always leaves, so when this lady came to victor on the peer eyes pouring he felt obliged to ask what is wrong in mourning?

yes dad is dead mum is gone bros the feds, im alone pr+ne and cold brittle bones brittle head
if i’m caring and i’m sharing surely that means that i’m feed, but whatever god i talk to try’s to pull me down instead
i am sick i am ill have lost all that’s in this world, my f+ckin cancers came back chemotherapy been billed, i can’t afford the rent i can’t afford the meals if u could spare me change or dollars that would truly mean the world

the lady lays down on victors shoulder in a fit, eyes melting and sobbing in a pure state of distress, as victor holds her tight he reaches into his pocket he pulls out 50 10s and 20s some gum and 50 cents. the lady smiled wiped her tears and kissed him goodbye, but victors stuck there frozen closed in paused and paralysed wait a surge of guilt and burden barreled over him revised cause why had he been in anguish when this other girl is fried, his problems didn’t matter in the grand sceme of her life, why worry about a bruise when this chicks been amputized, in the grand scheme of this ball victor wasn’t there at all, his ego, pain personas r the things he calls the wall

where do we draw the line, between mourning and benign, when we hitting 20 30s we still thirsty from our blights, before our time is over can we forgive certain crimes, not illegal but immoral excrete coral feelings fine
if victor stays in walls plagued with pain no gain but strife, those panels push his vision back to drunken druggy nights, sometimes u need a window, hole or crack to look outside, past the barrier that’s holding victor back from living life
what do u fear man why do u care, when everyone has there issues why is urs so dear
man, wake up wake up u f+ck u need to look in front because consciousness sobriety’s is one h+ll of a drug

so victor leaves with gratitude a new felt sense of tuff, he knows outside his sphere there’s more things down than up, he may be grateful but he’s lost himself isn’t enough, the thing that victor wants victor only needs is love

- okaga lyrics

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