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omen (2) - the georgia 400 sex cave lyrics

(1, 2, 3)

[part 1: cheesy beezy]
[husband] honey, we broke down. on the side of 400. goin’ north to charlottesville. or maybe not. maybe to another city that doesn’t have any connotations right now
we were going to another city. yeah, that’s better
[wife] i don’t want to sit. let’s not sit in the back of the car. let’s go towards the forest where it’s safe five hundred feet from the road
[son] i need to p++py!
[h] alright, that’s fine. you can p++p by the forest now. go ahead and sh+t

[part 2: cheesy beezy]
[h] hey, what is that gleaming light over there, that’s coming from that little precipice?
[w] i don’t really care, but we are safe now and that’s good
[h] alright, let’s lock the car
(beep beep)
[h] it’s locked. hey kid, you stay here. we’re gonna go investigate. look, it’s a little elf man
[theodore] h+llo, i am theodore. look at my purple shoes
[w] hey theodore

[part 3: cheesy beezy]
[h] what is it that you do? are you a plumber or a radio technician?
[t] no, i’m actually a person that helps other people get off
[h] get off… oh, get off the highway? is there some sort of path to a better form of civilization? our car broke down. can you help with cars?
[t] well i know a little bit about cars, if you know what i mean. ah, the leather… leather, t+they’re very bouncy, hahaha
[h] i don’t know what you mean, but honey, let’s go, you haven’t spoken in a while
[w] yeah i haven’t, but that’s fine

[part 4: cheesy beezy]
[narrator] the purple shoes then went up in the air, and he flew. then he went forward into the leaves, and he was, uh.. going branch from branch, branch from branch, trunk from trunk and down in the danch. and then he saw a little bit of ranch. that’s weird
[h] honey, let’s follow this man. maybe it knows about aaa or some kind of insurance
[w] i don’t think so. where’s our son? is our son still at the clearing?
[h] he’ll be safe, he’s away from the car. no… no trucks will come and get him, or any other… uh… m+m+m+mal… nothing bad will happen

[part 5: cheesy beezy]
[t] come on, you kids, let’s go to the s+x cave! and by kids i mean friends! i mean friends, let’s… uh… uh+i+i… what the f+ck did i just say? i don’t know! i am theodore the elf!
[h] alright, honey. we’re walking forward. we’re walking through pine. it’s a very dense forest. i think it will be fine. spiderweb in my face. i don’t really like that. but i walk forward still, maybe this man can help with my… cat?
[t] what’s wrong with your cat?

[part 6: cheesy beezy]
[h] now we’re by the river. this is a very nice one. what name is this river?
[t] it’s called “little river”. come to little river with me
[h] why’s it called “little river”?
[t] (chuckles) there are bigger things inside this cave
[h] alright, honey what do you think?
[w] uh, where’s our kid?
[h] he’s still at the car but he’ll be fine, he’s away from the street
[w] it’s not really a street, it’s a highway with four lanes
[h] (chuckles) there’s a tollbooth
[w] w… that doesn’t mean anything!

[part 7: cheesy beezy]
[n] “see that fox and rabbit?”, said theodore. “on the other side of the bridge on that raft.”
[h] uh, yeah, what about ‘em?
[t] well you see, we have to get the fox across here and also the rabbit but not at the same time, because one of them might eat the other, and it’s not the rabbit eating the fox, if you know what i mean
[h] um, alright, i took… math. um, so… do, uh… honey, what do you think?
[w] i don’t know but our kid is still… he’s still at the… at the road
[t] well, you know what they say about roads

[part 8: cheesy beezy]
[t] now that we got the rabbit and the fox across the river, we’re ready to go to the s+x cave. see that…
[w] what?
[h] what+what… what’d you say, sir?
[w] i, um… i don’t… feel comfortable with any sort of cave that involves, uh… penile+uh+v+g+n+l infiltration
[t] well that’s alright, because that+there’s nothing of that sort at the s+x cave. it’s all different types! it’s all+uh… i have purple shoes
[h] um… alright, so uh… are+um… are we walking towards the light?
[t] yes, you have to walk… sideways

[part 9: cheesy beezy]
[t] walk sideways, and walk… very fast. tippy+toe. tippy+toe now, everyone. tippy+toe, oh, i have purple shoes
[w] a+alright, well , uh, i’m…
[h] this might be a fat man’s squeeze, if you know what i mean!
[w] honey, you’re on a diet supplement. you do myfitnesspal everyday, where’s our kid?
[h] i don’t know honey… but we’re gonna keep going. what is this wet rock?
[t] this is the cave! it’s a very ill+strious, fun time. i hope that many dreams h+are in store for you right here

[part 10: cheesy beezy]
[t] welcome to the cave, population one. i+i hope that you have a good time, i hope you have some fun. look around you, you see many things poking out. the+u+uh+uh… many things will go into this, if you know what i mean
[h] well, at least i have my tape measurer. wow, this is about ten feet. what’s this for?
[t] oh, that is “the thing that curves” (+chuckles+). and the reason why it’s so high up is because you want to flip
[w] what’s this over here?
[t] that’s the “fluffy stick”. you know where that means. you’re in a thick, thick, thick d+ck!
[w] what’d you say?
[t] nothing, i have purple shoes
[w] yes, i know. honey, let’s get out of here, this man is obviously not from aaa. let’s leave this cave forever, and let’s…
(the wife bleeds violently and chokes to death because she was murdered)
[t] well, it seems that the fluffy stick found another victim today
[h] what’s… what’s going on now?
[t] welcome to the cave, population one. i have…
[h] yeah, purple shoes, i know. you’ve said that a billion times, why do you keep saying that?
[t] i have…
[h] what do you have?
[t] i have…
(theodore’s true form is revealed as a demonic sounds and other scary sh+t fills the cave)

the end

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