onemanband - pronouncement lyrics
[skit]
–car starting/door slams–
p-ssenger: man its cold as f-ck out here. why haven’t you fixed your d-mn heater yet?
driver: i’ve been meaning to… i just haven’t gotten around to it
p-ssenger: thats what you said last month. d-mn… procrastination at its finest
driver: do you have any idea how expensive it is to fix a heater?
p-ssenger: nope
driver: neither do i
–woman walks in the middle of the road and p-sses out–
p-ssenger: hol up hol up what the f-ck is that? is that a woman?
driver: what the…
p-ssenger: hey pull over right here. pull over right here. ma’am? ma’am you need help? sh-t she won’t wake up. what do we do?
driver: well, lets move her off to the side of the road before she gets run over by a car
p-ssenger: alright, i’ll grab the head you grab the legs?
driver: yeah, lets do it. ok you got her?
p-ssenger: yeah
driver: ok on the count of three… one… two… thre–
–woman wakes up and attacks the two people–
p-ssenger: oh sh-t!!
driver: what the f-ck?!?!
–driver pulls out his gun–
p-ssenger: ahhh she’s bitting my neck man
–driver starts shooting at woman–
driver: the f-ck?
p-ssenger: this b-tch is crazy man shoot this b-tch!
driver: i am she won’t die!
p-ssenger: what?
driver: she won’t die!
p-ssenger: the f-ck you mean she won’t die? shoot the b-tch in the head already!
driver: i’m trying man but the bullets keep on coming out of her skin
–woman turns around and runs towards driver–
driver: oh shi—
—-
grandmother
cousin
sister
mother
brother
daughter
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