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original broadway cast of hands on a hardbody - human drama kind of thing lyrics

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[benny, spoken]
everything you thought you knew
leave that all behind
just keep one hand on the truck
and try not to lose your mind
this is not a child’s game
this is not a game of chance

(sung)
it’s a sharp-honed sk!ll
it’s a test of will
it’s keeping still
when the devil tells you…”dance!”

it’s more than a contest
it’s more than dumb luck
it’s more than extra cash
it is much more than a truck!
someone’s gonna cry here
someone will go insane
someone will be laughing
at someone else’s pain

someone’s bound for glory
the rest are bound to lose
you’ll get a hundred different stories
with a

[all]
hundred point of views!

[benny]
ev’ry texan needs a ride
and this truck is bona fide
but only one can grab that ring

[all]
and god alone knows what he’ll bring!

[benny]
it’s a human drama kind of thing!

[frank, spoken]
this is frank nugent, comin’ to ya live from the hands on a hardbody contest, here at floyd king nissan!

[jingle]
floyd king nissan!
pick up and go!

[benny, greg, jesus, ronald, mike, frank, j.d., virginia]
some are on vacation
some are unemployed
someone will drive home elated
someone will walk home destroyed

[benny, heather, norma, kelli, janis, don, frank, mike]
everybody’s broke here
tryin’ to make ends meet
pay a debt back, had a setback
gotta get back on our feet

[benny]
so don’t make any judgments
let the players play
leave the judging to the judge
who’ll judge us all on judgment day

[benny, frank, mike, cindy]
bring your family, come alone
grab a corn dog or a cone
get yourself a bleacher seat
in the shade out of the heat
for this human drama kind of thing!

[contestants, don, virginia]
if i win this truck, all my troubles are through
just keep holdin’ on
that’s what i’m gonna do!
someone’s gettin’ lucky, now who will it be?
it’s me! it’s me!

[frank, spoken]
today’s contestants underwent a grueling screening process, did they not?

[cindy, spoken]
we drew their names out of a hat. business cards or beer coasters, it’s all in the luck of the draw!

[benny]
i put my name in early
there’s tricks that you can do

[jesus]
i sprinkled mine with cola
so it sticks to you like glue

[norma]
i put my faith in jesus!
he always sees me through

[kelli]
i put my name in thirty-two times, thirty-two times!

[janis]
i got six mouths to feed, and these are

[contestants, don, virginia]
troubling times!

[heather]
i rode my bike here every day!

{j.d.]
that pile of bills won’t go away

[ronald]
i drive a car ain’t got no brakes

[contestants, don, virginia]
and i’ll do anything it takes!
i never won nothin’, i came all the same
i thought i would die when they called out my name!
i prayed for a change to come year after year
it’s here! it’s here! it’s here!

[benny]
like the great ali did
when he changed his name from c-ssius
everybody’s hopin’ to rise
once more from the ashes!

[norma]
o lord – it’s been a real tough year
thank you for this chance right here
i’m shaking and i’m sick with fear, but

[norma, jesus, heather, j.d., greg, janis]
can i bend your ear a minute?
look at all these people in it

[contestants, don, virginia]
jesus, i just got to win
this truck!
this truck!
this truck this truck this truck!

[cindy, spoken]
the rules! one time, and one time only

[mike, spoken]
breaks are fifteen minutes once every six hours

[cindy, spoken]
you may not lean, squat, or rest your legs

[mike, spoken]
at no time may you remove your hand from the truck

[cindy, spoken]
and that hand must be covered! we’ve got these cotton gloves, courtesy of true value hardware

[mike, spoken]
no guns, no profanity

[cindy, spoken]
no alcohol or drugs

[all]
don’t make any judgments
let the players play
leave the judging to the judge
who’ll judge us all on judgment day!

[contestants, don, virginia]
this could be my ticket out
long as i just stick it out

[all]
get a good seat in the stands
for the layin’ on of hands!

[cindy, spoken]
gloves on!

[frank, benny, mike]
it’s a human drama kind of thing!

[contestants, don, virginia]
i’ll stand here for days in the crowds and the heat!

[janis, j.d., norma, kelli, greg, heather, chris]
i ain’t givin’ up!

[kelli, j.d., greg, ronald]
i’m the cowboy to beat!

[all contestants, don, virginia]
someone’s gettin’ lucky, now who will it be?
it’s me!
it’s me!

[chris]
i’ve been feelin’ kind of low

[benny]
it’s a human drama kind of thing!

[greg]
no work since two years ago

[benny]
it’s a human drama kind of thing!

[jesus]
guess who’s driving home this truck?

[contestants, don]
it’s me!

[benny]
i’m little, but i think i’m big
gonna get all rambo on this rig!

[contestants, don, virginia, cindy]
here’s redemption, no tax exemption
but transportation and inspiration
if i just stand and i keep my hand on this thing!

[benny]
it’s a human drama kind of thing!

[contestants, don, virginia, cindy]
i’ll honk my horn again, be reborn again
busted flat, now i’m up to bat and i swing!

[benny]
the way it’s lookin’ here to me
the winner’s gonna have to be – benny!

[contestants, don, virginia]
a body’s got to feel his worth
reason for his time on earth
guess who’s driving home this truck?
it’s-

[norma, chris, kelli, jesus, janis, don]
can i bend your ear a minute?

[mike, spoken]
okay, people! let’s start this puppy!

[norma, chris, kelli, jesus, janis, don]
won’t you let me drive home in it?

[cindy, spoken]
ten seconds!

[norma, chris, kelli, jesus, janis, don]
jesus, i just got to win this-

[cindy, spoken]
five!

[all but cindy, mike, frank]
truck! this truck! this truck!

[mike & cindy, spoken]
hands on!

- original broadway cast of hands on a hardbody lyrics

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