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original broadway cast of merrily we roll along - it's a hit! lyrics

[enormous applause from inside as joe opens the stage door
charley turns on his tape recorder; music starts.]

[joe]
listen to that!
[another roar of applause from inside.]
did you listen to that?
[and another.]
do you know what that means?
let me tell you what that means
wait, no, anyone who even thinks it
don’t say it, you’ll jinx it!

[frank]
listen to that!
[ovation from charley’s tape.]
will you listen to that?
does that make you feel proud?
well, feel more than just proud
okay, wait, i’ll tempt fate
and i’ll state it out loud:
[ovation as charley opens the stage door for a moment and they all bask in the sound.]

that, unless i miss my guess, is…
i can’t stand it!
listen!
yes!
that’s the sound of a hit!
it’s a hit!
gang, i think this is it!
no more writing clever little shows
for those bas-m-nt saloons
no more proclamations from the pros
that “you can’t hum the tunes”

[mary]
no more sneaking in at intermission
to the plays you wish you could afford

[frank]
or producers having you audition
whenever they’re bored

[charley]
and who’ll say
right away
as you play
the first chord:
(spoken)
“boys, that’s just great. but next time, don’t be so clever.”

[all]
it’s a hit!
it’s a hit!

[joe]
you’re ahead, you should quit

[frank]
no more coaching those sopranos
with voices like bees

[charley]
no more secondhand pianos
with six broken keys

[mary]
no more agents giving you opinions
while they turn you over to their minions

[all]
just for these
guarantees
we should please
thank the lord
it’s a hit!
it’s a hit!

[mary]
(to frank)
will your in-laws just spit!
after all of that baloney
they’ve made you go through
all that muttering that you’re a phony
’cause what do you do?
will their faces be stony
when they see on their sony
someone handing the phony
the tony award!

[mary gives frank an umbrella to serve as a microphone.]

[frank, spoken]
i would like to begin by thanking everyone who turned down everything i have written so i could win this!

[ovation as charley opens the stage door.]

[all]
it’s a hit!

[joe]
hold it
folks, there’s still the reviews left
both the trib and the news left
early
surly
not a good sign
also, even if there’s a chance, folks
let’s not forget the advance, folks
not a
lotta
cash, folks

[charley]
also, even if it’s a smash, folks
doesn’t that mean we sell out?

[joe]
well, i hope we sell out…

[charley]
what i mean is sell out
well, you know
success is like failure
it’s how you perceive it
it’s what you do with it
not how you achieve it
and i can’t believe it’s a hit!

[audience applauds.]

it’s a hit!
it’s a hit!
it’s a—

[frank]
listen to that!
will you listen to that?
tell me, is that a noise
or is that a noise?
that is the noise we’ve been
waiting the whole of our lives to hear!
[charley]
listen to that!
would you listen to that?
buddy
is that a noise
or is that a noise?
where’s the machine?
gotta get it on tape for our wives to hear! [frank]

listen to that!

i can’t

stand it!

[mary turns on the tape recorder.]

[mary]
listen to that!
that’s obscene!
[joe]
listen to that!
fellas, that is a noise that is really a noise!
i can’t stand it!
will you
listen to that? [charley]
listen to that!
did you listen to that?
i can’t stand it!
did you listen to that?
listen to that! [mary]
that’s a noise that is really a
listen to that!
will you listen to that?
golly, i can’t
stand it! [frank]
listen to that!
that is the noise i’ve been waiting my life to hear!
listen to that!
listen to that!
will you
listen to that!

[all]
will you listen to that?
that’s the sound of an audience losing its mind!
it’s the pope on his balcony, blessing mankind!

[joe]
folks, it’s “funny girl”, “fiddler”
and “dolly” combined!

[all]
it’s a hit!
it’s a hit!
it’s a palpable hit!

[frank & charley]
if it only even runs a minute
at least it’s a wedge
it’s the theatre and we’re really in it
not just on the edge!

[joe]
if your spirits ever need improving
you can drop in any night for free!

[frank, looking at charley]
but the thing that’s positively moving—

[charley, to frank]
you could have fooled me

[frank & charley]
is that we’re still good friends!
nothing can k!ll good friends!
where there’s a will, good friends
don’t need success to survive!

[all]
and us, good friends
what’s to discuss, good friends!
we’ve got a surefire
genuine
walkaway
blockbuster
lines down to broadway
boffola
sensational
box office
lalapalooza
gargantuan—
hit!
it’s a hit!
it’s a hit! it’s a hit! it’s a hit! it’s a hit!
it’s a hit! it’s a hit! it’s a hit! it’s a hit!

- original broadway cast of merrily we roll along lyrics

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