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original off broadway cast of penelope - pigs! lyrics

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[daphne]
pigs!
why did it have to be pigs?
of all of the marvelous gigs
i could have gotten
what could be more rotten
than having your lot in
life pigs?

hogs!
why do i have to tend hogs?
there’s no point wearing nice togs
why bother shopping’
for somethin’ eye+poppin’
when you spend your life sloppin’ hogs?

pigs love mud and oh, they smell
so you can’t help but smell as well
if you want a boy, that’s a biggie
who wants to get jiggy with little miss piggy?

ugh!
cows!
i’d be contented with cows
except that i like to carouse
and i’d have to get up at dawn without letup
forget what i said about cows
though i admit that pigs are smart
and cute little piglets warm your heart
if you think they’re pets, you’re mistaken
’cause who wants a pig that will wind up as bacon?

sheep!
i could be happy with sheep
lookin’ like little bo peep
when boys come to play
we would romp in the hay
and i’d keep them away from the sheep

oh i’d look fine as a shepherdess
with a dainty crook, and a clean white dress
topped off with a pink and white bonnet
with not a speck of mud or pig blood upon it

[pigs]
ooh

[daphne]
but there’s no point in looking fine
when your perfume is eau de swine
they don’t make designer dresses
for women who are swineherdesses
pigs!
why did my parents raise pigs?
of all the marvelous gigs
i could have been given
if they were more driven
i spend my life livin’ with
oink
oink
soo+ey

pigs!

- original off broadway cast of penelope lyrics

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