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peter schickele (comedian) - getting ready lyrics

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(professor schickele is getting ready for that nights’ show. he seems distrated.)

[blondie]
what’s wrong, prof?

[professor schickele]
oh, nothing

[blondie]
right. a few seconds away from airtime and you look like your best friend just died. nothing’s wrong!

[professor schickele]
i just… can’t get used to it. i’ve been doing this show for over a month and i still feel like i’m… somebody else

[blondie]
oh, come on, prof. i know you’re not real comfortable with the format + but think of how many more people you’ll reach on wtwp then you did on that university station

[jocko]
she’s right, prof!

[professor schickele]
yeah, but+

[jocko]
no, really, how big an audience did that program of yours actually have? one?

[professor schickele]
oh, come on, my dad listened, too!

[blondie]
but isn’t your bottom line classical music? and spreading it around to as many people as possible? wtwp can be heard in at least three counties!

[jocko]
that’s a lot of markets!

[blondie]
whereas the range of that university station was what?

[jocko]
we’re talking yards here

[professor schickele]
i know, i know. i just feel like… like i’m betraying all those years i spent training as a musicalologist

[blondie]
oh, but you’re not! you’re just being an entertainer as well as a scholar!

[professor schickele]
yeah, but… it’s just… (sigh) you know, things like how jocko treats the people who call in+

[jocko]
they love it, prof, it’s part of the schtick. that’s the most popular bit on the whole show! if they didn’t love it, they wouldn’t call in!

[blondie]
look at it this way, prof: you’re lucky to be at a station that plays classical music at all. i mean, the way things are going, i mean… you could be+

[jocko]
(suddenly, imitating a siren) weep, weep, weep, conversation’s over kids, here we go!

[blondie]
oh, who’s doing the id?

[jocko]
it’s mine!

(the program goes on air)

this is wtwp, the voice of the turtle mountains!

- peter schickele comedian lyrics

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